I wanted to be clever, but being funny came first. That's how you know someone is clever. They don't come out and tell you pi to 13 places - they tell you a joke.
There are no Hollywood stars speaking out for the elderly. They're forgotten, bewildered, and I don't think it's because people are cruel or don't care. It's because you don't want to think about your own mortality. I think people don't talk about it enough.
I think I'm pretty self-aware.
I see my real job now as - never mind 'The Office,' 'Extras,' film career, Emmys - I want everyone in the world to know who Karl Pilkington is.
If I've only got a career if I bring David Brent back, you can have it.
Sometimes being old is used as an insult, which is bizarre because, if you're lucky, that's literally going to happen to you. It's a strange thing to gloat about: being born recently.
My career, I look at it in a Darwinian framework. I'm going to do exactly what I want, and I'm going to survive, or I'm not. I'm not going to pander. I'm not going to change things. I'm not going to do focus groups. I'll live and die by the sword. I don't care. Because I couldn't live with myself.
I don't mind what people say about me as long as it's an opinion or the truth. If someone says, 'He's the worst comedian in the world,' that's fine. If someone says, 'His face makes me want to punch the TV,' that's fine. But if they say, 'Oh, and I know for a fact he hunts squirrels,' I go: no, no, no... that's a lie.
I was never ambitious. I was never ambitious at school.
Even on the stage, I've played a bit of a persona, and the persona I played was a much brasher, more arrogant, less aware, less educated version of me.
Let's be honest here: Twitter, for me, is 90 per cent a marketing tool.
I'm a fan of the kind of political correctness that is about not promoting prejudice. But some people in America are offended by equality because when you've had privilege for so long, equality feels like oppression.
When I see a headline 'Guess who's going out with who?' I don't guess, and I don't click.
Humor is to get us over terrible things.
I don't know why other people are concerned about other people's lives that much.
The grass isn't always greener on the other side!
I lift weights. Then I put them down again.
If you spend your days doing what you love, it is impossible to fail. So I go about my days trying to bring something into the world that wasn't in the world before. And then everyone gets furious about it. And then I sit back and say, 'I did that!'
To be fair to David Brent, he wants to be famous for doing something, for being a musician, but he's just not good enough.
I love UFC, vigilante films, and any acts of merciless heroism.
When I was about to be famous, I feared it on a few levels. I feared it because I didn't want people to lump me in with those people who'd do anything to be famous. I didn't like the word 'celebrity.' I feared intrusion, you know? Make me famous, and suddenly you can go through my trash bins.
With the Internet era and social media and politics being so out there with the lies, now you've got people denying things they're on camera doing, and then you've got people not really caring about the truth. You've got people supporting people who've done horrific things, but just don't want the other side to get any satisfaction.
I was very protective of my privacy. I didn't want people to write bad things about me that weren't true, because that's just not fair. Fifty percent of everything written about me is wrong.
I think being nice is more important than being clever.
It's funny because I was offered film parts the first week after 'The Office' went out. I was sent a script, and I said, 'Who's the lead?' They said, 'We want you to be.' And I said: 'Well, who's going to go and see that? You want John Cusack.'
I don't believe in ghosts or ESP or elves... or God. But I am spiritual in the sense that I get a lump in my throat when I listen to Vaughan Williams.
Everything I do is somehow rooted in humanity. It's always about people; it's always about ego. It's always about desperation. It's quite existential. You know, 'Am I leading a good life?' That might be because I'm an atheist, and I think this is all we've got, so you better be nice. And have fun.
I like grown-up comedy, where it's about character and attitude and life as opposed to obvious gross-out and jokes.
As an artist, you want as many people as possible to see your work with no interference. And usually, I've gone onto fringe channels: BBC Two, HBO, Channel 4.
Look, just tell me where that lemon came from and I'll shut up and go away.
I've avoided doing a network comedy, because I wouldn't get my own way. Even though it would get more viewers, it wouldn't be mine.
Why buy a book when you can join a library.
I stand by 'I'm not going to do 'The Office' again.' That would be weird: all the same people sitting at the same desks at a paper merchant's in Slough.
You give up a lot being an atheist.
That's the buzz for me, the creative process. An idea is never as good as when it's in your head. And then it's just how little you ruin it.
I think Spielberg is a master. I think 'Jaws' invented a genre.
I always do a little bit of improv. I did some of 'The Office,' a tiny bit in 'Extras,' a bit more in 'Derek.'
You should make something. You should bring something into the world that wasn't in the world before. It doesn't matter what it is. It doesn't matter if it's a table or a film or gardening-everyone should create. You should do something, then sit back and say, 'I did that.'
I do the Golden Globes because they say I can say what I want. I wouldn't have that at the Oscars.
I think you can make fun of anything except things people can't help. They can't help their race or their sex or their age, so you ridicule their pretension or their ego instead. You can ridicule ideas - ideas don't have feelings. You can ridicule an idea that someone holds without hurting them.
I think comedies should be short. I don't want to be self-indulgent; I don't want a two-hour comedy.
Honor is a gift a man gives himself. You can be as good as anyone that ever lived. If you can read, you can learn everything that anyone ever learned. But you've got to want it.
You can be watching the greatest film in the world, and if you hear your neighbor getting into a fight, you're at the window.
If I was a research scientist, I'd want people to say, 'You know what, he's a great research scientist, that Ricky Gervais. He's really good, really good.' You know, I'd go to award ceremonies for research scientists and go, 'Yeah, I really worked hard, yeah.' It's brilliant.
I've been lucky enough to be able to choose exactly where I want to live.
The second series is always my favourite as a writer/director; you can hit the ground running... so that's fun.
I like flying to New York from London. It's like a day off for me. No phone or e-mails. Food, wine, iPod, movies, snoozing.
Cynicism, to me, is trying to make people as unhappy as you are.
I was David Bowie-thin up to about 28, and then I discovered food.
What makes 'Derek' a different kind of sitcom - if it is even a sitcom - is its sincerity.
I'd much rather eat exactly what I want, and then burn it off, than diet.
Stupidity without malice isn't horrible; some people can't help it.
I think all art - even one as lowly as making jokes about celebrities - is there to make a connection.
I've got re-addicted to normal people, which is the loveliest thing to write about.
I think it's important to hold a mirror up to society and yourself.
Pol Pot - he rounded up anybody he thought was intellectual and had them executed. And how he told someone was intellectual or not was whether they wore glasses. If they're that clever, take them off when they see him coming!
I don't like it when I see a racist comedian go up and say, 'What are we gonna do about all these immigrants?' and they get a round the applause. I think, 'Well that's not a joke. That's just your biased opinion.'
Proper stupidity is fascinating.
I am myself sometimes, and I do state my opinions, but not in a comedy routine and not in my character. There always has to be some sort of layer to it.
If I just cut out the food, I'd have a six-pack. I'd look like Matthew McConaughey.
Free speech is one of the most important things to me, but I think it gets confusing when it comes to offense. Because for one, just because you have the right to say anything, it doesn't mean you have to.
The best script in the world doesn't work perfectly when you actually act it out. That's a law. That's a given. So you have to play with everything. And the more fun you have with it, the better the finished product.
I haven't had my teeth fixed, I haven't had a hair transplant. I haven't had a skin peel, tummy tuck. I've done literally nothing.
I am not a wolf in sheep's clothing, I'm a wolf in wolf's clothing.
I remember asking my mum when I was about 13, 'Why are my brothers and sister so much older than me?' And she just said, 'You were a mistake.' And I laughed.
I really just want to make Karl Pilkington the new messiah. Ricky Gervais New, Karl, Messiah All of my friends are oddities.
I could always take a joke. I could always be the butt of the joke. I could always hand it out. That was just who I was.
People confuse the subject of the joke with the target of the joke, and they're very rarely the same.
I love 'The Godfather' and 'Casablanca' - great stories, acted well, made well.
Stephen Merchant looks like a Muppet. I mean, he looks like Beaker.
When I go to work, I don't want to make depressing, gritty, urban stories that are depressing to watch. I want to give people something to enjoy. When people think I'm a control freak and an ogre - which I am - it's only because I want my work to be accessible and Everyman, in a way.
I'm a scientist at heart, so I know how important the truth is. However inconvenient, however unattractive, however embarrassing, however shocking, the truth is the truth, and wanting it not to be true doesn't change things.
A couple of people I knew went to university apart from me, but all the way through I was the smartest kid in the school. That's luck, but I was proud of it. And I was also proud of doing well without trying. As you get older, and it took me a long time to realise it, that's a disgusting attitude, revolting.
Karl Pilkington has the roundest head, I think, in the world. It's not technically a deformity, but I've never seen anything quite that spherical.
I don't care whether people say, ''The Office' is rubbish, 'Extras' is worse, 'Flanimals' is a waste of time. He's not funny; he never has been. I hate him.' I don't mind that at all. In fact, not only do I expect it, I celebrate it, because I think the haters are really important.
There's no difference between fame and infamy now. There's a new school of professional famous people that don't do anything. They don't create anything.
I find comedy easy, and I find drama exciting and tantalising.
Oh, let's face it: I hate everything in others.
Comedy is easy for me, but with drama, I don't know... it's still the Holy Grail.
Your reputation is still the most important thing that you've got.
Believe it or not, I work out regularly.
The only thing that really depresses me is animal cruelty.
I'd never tried as hard with anything as I did with 'The Office,' and it was one of the things I'm proud of. I wasn't trying to be famous or a comedian, but this opportunity came along when I was 38 or 39. It came late, and I couldn't have been prouder of it.
Science is constantly proved all the time. If we take something like any fiction, any holy book, and destroyed it, in a thousand years' time, that wouldn't come back just as it was. Whereas if we took every science book and every fact and destroyed them all, in a thousand years they'd all be back because all the same tests would be the same result.
You can laugh at anything. It depends on the joke.
Ego is hilarious - especially the vanity of a comedian. As soon as you see one start worrying about how cool he is or about how many stadiums he can fill, he stops being funny.
Fame is an upshot of what I do. If you're a successful comedian or actor, then you're a famous one. But it's not the driving force. It's a by-product.
My dad was a laborer. And he used to get up at 5:30 every morning. He worked for 50 years of his life, in all weathers for, by showbiz standards, petty cash. I remind myself of that when I feel a little bit spoiled or hard done by.
There's nothing wrong with being respected by your peers. There's nothing wrong with trying to do your best. There's nothing wrong with success. There's not even anything wrong with trying to get a raise. There's nothing wrong with that.
I don't do one-liners, because you don't learn anything about that comedian.
I'm a fang-toothed, blob-nosed, slouchy slob. Ricky Gervais Slob I didn't like noisy cinemas when I wasn't famous.
Making people laugh is easy for me. I'm quite proud of that. But I'm prouder of silencing an audience for a minute because they're thinking about something.
How many times have we seen reality celebrities fall from grace - often through no fault of their own - and then go on a show like 'Celebrity Big Brother' and say, 'I want to show the public a different side of me.' And I'm screaming at the telly going, 'This is not therapy. This is voyeurism!'
I'm an optimist.
I didn't know I was poor, growing up, because everyone was in the same boat. I couldn't have bikes. It never really bothered me, but I could have any book. I loved school; I loved learning. Yeah, I never cared for possessions. I still don't, really.
People now live their lives like an open wound to be famous - they do bad things because they're rewarded for it.
Where there's a will - there's a relative!
Luckily, even when people are shouting lies, the truth is undamaged. Science doesn't matter what you believe.
I think Dustin Hoffman has been in at least three of my favorite movies of all time with things like 'Tootsie,' 'Marathon Man.' Getting a bit more arthouse and darker, 'The Graduate' - incredible, barrier-breaking movie, 'The Graduate.'
The great thing about being an artist is, we want our work to be seen.
I think our elderly are forgotten sometimes.
I'm influenced by those '40s, '50s, and '60s films: things like 'The Apartment' - I was a big fan of Billy Wilder.
I don't do karaoke. I don't dance, even at weddings. I'm the grumpy one sitting down drinking wine.
With Netflix, I browse; I watch documentaries about things I'd never dream of, but I think, 'I might as well.'
I like the ironic pomposity of a stand-up comedian. Like all those comedians thinking they can bring down Coca-Cola. They forget to be funny.
Even I can't talk about myself for an hour.
When I was growing up, I didn't like cheese. I had to wean myself onto cheese.
I don't know what Trump has to do to lose his supporters. It's like a religion. He's a school bully.
Montag, 25. Juni 2018
Freitag, 22. Juni 2018
Happy Birthday Meryl Streep!
There's no road map on how to raise a family: it's always an enormous negotiation.
Having been let out of the barn once, I know I wouldn't be happy if I were home all the time.
I have a holistic need to work and to have huge ties of love in my life. I can't imagine eschewing one for the other.
I don't know very much about, honestly, about the Middle East, and yet I've played a lot of different people from a lot of different cultures. The thing that I notice is that we're all - there is a core of humanity that travels right through every culture. And, after all, we're all from Africa originally.
I'm all over the place.
I don't know why I don't watch a lot of movies; I can barely keep up with the things my friends are in. There isn't enough time in life.
My job is usually to express emotion as freely as possible.
It's amazing how easily people are led to fury and chaos. Unhappy people with guns are not going to make this country great.
I need to go where people are serious about acting.
I had this sort of idolatry for certain actors who preceded me, people who inspired me, so I'm honored to be that way for young actors.
The reason I chose the movies that I did was based on where they were being filmed.
Motherhood has a very humanizing effect. Everything gets reduced to essentials.
I think your self emerges more clearly over time.
I'm older. There's some sort of seniority. As a matter of fact, the seniority ebbs as you get older.
Sometimes with my children, I remember exactly how I felt as the child in this situation, not just how it feels to be me.
Don't give up or give in in the face of patronising ridicule, amused disdain, or being ignored.
My feeling about fears is, if you voice your fears, they may come true. I'm superstitious enough to believe that.
I believe in imagination. I did Kramer vs. Kramer before I had children. But the mother I would be was already inside me.
Enough people write about me every day without even interviewing me.
The interesting thing about being a mother is that everyone wants pets, but no one but me cleans the kitty litter.
My family really does come first. It always did and always will.
I think the most liberating thing I did early on was to free myself from any concern with my looks as they pertained to my work.
Show business has been really, really good to me because I can work and take a lot of time off, and I'm extremely undisciplined person.
Acting is not about being someone different. It's finding the similarity in what is apparently different, then finding myself in there.
For me, clothes are kind of character; I don't follow fashion or understand trends.
How you first meet the public is how the industry sees you. You can't argue with them. That's their perception.
If I am not confident that I can portray the character perfectly on screen, I won't even try.
I think you have to listen to the people who are deeply unhappy. You have to find the source of it and not overreact to the craziness in it.
I couldn't care less about fashion. If I had taken any clothes home, they would have remained in my closet for the rest of their existence.
All an actor has is their blind faith that they are who they say they are today, in any scene.
The work will stand, no matter what.
You just have to keep on doing what you do. It's the lesson I get from my husband; he just says, Keep going. Start by starting.
Expensive clothes are a waste of money.
I have a very good life - I'm lucky enough not to be deprived.
America doesn't reward people of my age, either in day-to-day life or for their performances.
I let the actions of my life stand for what I am as a human being. Contend with that, not the words.
Every single decision I make about what material I do, what I'm putting out in the world, is because of my children.
The progression of roles you take strings together a portrait of an actor, but it's a completely random process.
The aggregate of everybody's emotion, it's such a powerful thing. You can see it in the Trump rallies, where people - I just know, in their living rooms, would be better people - are driven to the worst possibilities by the bloodlust in a crowd. It just gets ginned up, and they're outside of themselves.
You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing.
I have a pretty good idea of what I am not good at and have it front and centre of my consciousness every minute I am doing it.
Personality is immediately apparent, from birth, and I don't think it really changes.
I didn't really like opera. I liked cheerleading and boys and, later, smoking. So my opera career was cut short when I was 15. My dad got sick, and we couldn't afford the lessons, so I stopped and became a cheerleader and wrecked my voice.
All that attention to the perfect lighting, the perfect this, the perfect that, I find terribly annoying.
I think I'm not a natural performer; I think I'm an actor.
I'm never so sure as I was in my mid-20s.
I know what I do and what it means to me and where its sources lie, and that's mine. It still is mine.
Grace, respect, reserve, and empathetic listening are qualities sorely missing from the public discourse now.
I am a humanist. I am for nice, easy balance.
There are improbable things suspended in space, like the earth.
People at agencies and studios, including the parent boards, might look around the table at the decision-making level and feel something is wrong if half their participants are not women. Because our tastes are different, what we value is different. Not better, different.
I'm really interested in the collaborative thing. It's what makes it scary because you never know what it's going to end up like. But you hope. You put yourself in the hands of the best people you can find, and you're completely dependent on the kindness of strangers and their commitment. It's like this mutual delusion.
Nobody can swashbuckle a quick-witted riposte like Emma Thompson. She's a writer, a real writer, and she has a relish for the well-chosen word.
I remember, as I was hovering around 40, I thought each movie would be my last, really.
Hillary Clinton has taken some fire over 40 years of her fight for families and children. How does she do it? That's what I want to know. Where does she get her grit and her grace? Where do any of our female firsts, our pathbreakers, where do they find that strength?
Leave me to the thing I love. I love acting. But being called 'the greatest living actress' - a designation not even my mother would sanction - is the opposite of good or valuable or useful. It is a curse for a working actor.
I can't do a lot of things, like golf. I don't like golf. I mean, I really don't, because I tend to like things that I can do right away. If I can't do it right away, I don't like it.
Men should look at the world as if something is wrong when their voices predominate. They should feel it.
I have a very clear understanding of what my voice is. It's like a B voice. It hovers around B-minus, B-plus. I have great friends who are wonderful singers, and I know I'll never be able to do that. But singing through a character is something I can do.
I think we all think we sound really good in the shower, where there's that nice reverb, and the water's drowning you out, and there is some liberation in the freedom of being totally alone and really going for it.
You can't strategize falling in love, can you? It's never worked. People love you the most and set you up, and it doesn't work because you can't predict these things. You fall in love serially.
Disney, who brought joy, arguably, to billions of people, was, perhaps, or had some... racist proclivities. He formed and supported an anti-Semitic industry lobby. And he was certainly, on the evidence of his company's policies, a gender bigot.
When I was a kid, when I was 16, 17, I'd come home from high school, and my dad collected all of Barbra Streisand's records. And she was very young then. I think she probably had three records out, and she was 21, and we had them all. And I knew every single song, every breath, every elision, every swell. And I sang along to it.
The great gift of human beings is that we have the power of empathy.
I go to a lot of movies where people are all around me laughing, and I feel like I'm from outer space because I find it dangerous and stupid and horrible and degrading to women and all these things.
It's a good thing to imagine yourself doing something you think you can't. I do that every day because, basically, if I had it my way, I'd just stay home and think about what I'm having for supper.
I was offered, within one year, three different witch roles. It was almost like the world was saying - or the studios were saying - 'We don't know what to do with you.'
I have a very busy life, and not many people who have a career and four kids go out a lot to the movies.
I know movies are a function of our dream world. And when you project yourself on screen, it's easier to project yourself into what you were, not what you are.
It's bizarre that the produce manager is more important to my children's health than the pediatrician.
I think that you find your own way… In the end, it’s what feels right to you. Not what your mother told you. Not what some actress told you. Not what anybody else told you but the still, small voice.
Don't waste so much time thinking about how much you weigh. There is no more mind-numbing, boring, idiotic, self-destructive diversion from the fun of living.
The minute you start caring about what other people think, is the minute you stop being yourself.
I'm a pain in the ass to all of the costume designers with whom I work because I have very strong feelings about the subject.
True freedom is understanding that we have a choice in who and what we allow to have power over us.
It is well that the earth is round that we do not see too far ahead.
It’s good to push yourself and do what you don’t necessarily want to do, that if you’re not automatically good at it, you should try it. Trying is so important.
The work is the most fun; it seems illicit how much fun it is.
My advice: don’t waste so much time worrying about your skin or your weight. Develop what you do, what you put your hands on in the world.
What does it take to be the first female anything? It takes grit, and it takes grace.
The formula of happiness and success is just being actually yourself, in the most vivid possible way you can.
Chris Cooper is one of my favorite actors in the world. I've seen him in most everything he's done.
Power, influence, strength — all those things can overpower what’s important in life. But as long as you have food and shelter over your head, if the necessities are taken care of, what makes us happy on top of that is very simple.
Everything we say signifies; everything counts, that we put out into the world. It impacts on kids, it impacts on the zeitgeist of the time.
Put blinders onto those things that conspire to hold you back, especially the ones in your own head.
Obsession is an attractive thing. People who are really, really interested and good at one thing and smart are attractive, if they're men.
As there begins to be less time ahead of you, you want to be exactly who you are, without making it easier for everyone else.
Service is the only thing that's important about love. Everybody is worried about 'losing yourself' - all this narcissism. Duty. We can't stand that idea now either... But duty might be a suit of armor you put on to fight for your love.
People will say to me, ‘You’ve played so many strong women’ and I’ll say, ‘Have you ever said to a man, ‘You’ve played so many strong men?’
You win an Oscar, it can double the audience that you had before.
You can't suppress the things that make us human. It's pointless to try.
I'm thrilled when I get nominated. I don't count how many and I don't remember how many I've had. I just know it's a lot.
Integrate what you believe in every single area of your life. Take your heart to work and ask the most and best of everybody else, too.
I get a trickling few scripts that I'm lucky enough that some of them are great. I don't get loads of scripts.
The more you are in this business, the more humbled by it you become.
Some people are filled by compassion and a desire to do good, and some simply don't think anything's going to make a difference.
We are who we're going to be when we're very old, and when we're very old we are who we were when we were 8.
I have four to five months, tops, per year to give to my acting work.
I want to feel my life while I'm in it.
There are wonderfully talented actresses. It's a really rich field. There isn't as rich a field of material.
I'm curious about other people. That's the essence of my acting. I'm interested in what it would be like to be you.
People say, When you have children, everything changes. But maybe things are awakened that were already there.
Instant gratification is not soon enough.
I always feel like I can't do it, that I can't go through with a movie. But then I do go through with it after all.
Interestingly, young people don't come to you for advice. Especially the ones who are related to you.
I didn't have any confidence in my beauty when I was young. I felt like a character actress, and I still do.
I don't like to be gone all weekend and at night too. Because for 20 years, I've had children who are in school.
I can't stand most things that I see.
Having been let out of the barn once, I know I wouldn't be happy if I were home all the time.
I have a holistic need to work and to have huge ties of love in my life. I can't imagine eschewing one for the other.
I don't know very much about, honestly, about the Middle East, and yet I've played a lot of different people from a lot of different cultures. The thing that I notice is that we're all - there is a core of humanity that travels right through every culture. And, after all, we're all from Africa originally.
I'm all over the place.
I don't know why I don't watch a lot of movies; I can barely keep up with the things my friends are in. There isn't enough time in life.
My job is usually to express emotion as freely as possible.
It's amazing how easily people are led to fury and chaos. Unhappy people with guns are not going to make this country great.
I need to go where people are serious about acting.
I had this sort of idolatry for certain actors who preceded me, people who inspired me, so I'm honored to be that way for young actors.
The reason I chose the movies that I did was based on where they were being filmed.
Motherhood has a very humanizing effect. Everything gets reduced to essentials.
I think your self emerges more clearly over time.
I'm older. There's some sort of seniority. As a matter of fact, the seniority ebbs as you get older.
Sometimes with my children, I remember exactly how I felt as the child in this situation, not just how it feels to be me.
Don't give up or give in in the face of patronising ridicule, amused disdain, or being ignored.
My feeling about fears is, if you voice your fears, they may come true. I'm superstitious enough to believe that.
I believe in imagination. I did Kramer vs. Kramer before I had children. But the mother I would be was already inside me.
Enough people write about me every day without even interviewing me.
The interesting thing about being a mother is that everyone wants pets, but no one but me cleans the kitty litter.
My family really does come first. It always did and always will.
I think the most liberating thing I did early on was to free myself from any concern with my looks as they pertained to my work.
Show business has been really, really good to me because I can work and take a lot of time off, and I'm extremely undisciplined person.
Acting is not about being someone different. It's finding the similarity in what is apparently different, then finding myself in there.
For me, clothes are kind of character; I don't follow fashion or understand trends.
How you first meet the public is how the industry sees you. You can't argue with them. That's their perception.
If I am not confident that I can portray the character perfectly on screen, I won't even try.
I think you have to listen to the people who are deeply unhappy. You have to find the source of it and not overreact to the craziness in it.
I couldn't care less about fashion. If I had taken any clothes home, they would have remained in my closet for the rest of their existence.
All an actor has is their blind faith that they are who they say they are today, in any scene.
The work will stand, no matter what.
You just have to keep on doing what you do. It's the lesson I get from my husband; he just says, Keep going. Start by starting.
Expensive clothes are a waste of money.
I have a very good life - I'm lucky enough not to be deprived.
America doesn't reward people of my age, either in day-to-day life or for their performances.
I let the actions of my life stand for what I am as a human being. Contend with that, not the words.
Every single decision I make about what material I do, what I'm putting out in the world, is because of my children.
The progression of roles you take strings together a portrait of an actor, but it's a completely random process.
The aggregate of everybody's emotion, it's such a powerful thing. You can see it in the Trump rallies, where people - I just know, in their living rooms, would be better people - are driven to the worst possibilities by the bloodlust in a crowd. It just gets ginned up, and they're outside of themselves.
You can't get spoiled if you do your own ironing.
I have a pretty good idea of what I am not good at and have it front and centre of my consciousness every minute I am doing it.
Personality is immediately apparent, from birth, and I don't think it really changes.
I didn't really like opera. I liked cheerleading and boys and, later, smoking. So my opera career was cut short when I was 15. My dad got sick, and we couldn't afford the lessons, so I stopped and became a cheerleader and wrecked my voice.
All that attention to the perfect lighting, the perfect this, the perfect that, I find terribly annoying.
I think I'm not a natural performer; I think I'm an actor.
I'm never so sure as I was in my mid-20s.
I know what I do and what it means to me and where its sources lie, and that's mine. It still is mine.
Grace, respect, reserve, and empathetic listening are qualities sorely missing from the public discourse now.
I am a humanist. I am for nice, easy balance.
There are improbable things suspended in space, like the earth.
People at agencies and studios, including the parent boards, might look around the table at the decision-making level and feel something is wrong if half their participants are not women. Because our tastes are different, what we value is different. Not better, different.
I'm really interested in the collaborative thing. It's what makes it scary because you never know what it's going to end up like. But you hope. You put yourself in the hands of the best people you can find, and you're completely dependent on the kindness of strangers and their commitment. It's like this mutual delusion.
Nobody can swashbuckle a quick-witted riposte like Emma Thompson. She's a writer, a real writer, and she has a relish for the well-chosen word.
I remember, as I was hovering around 40, I thought each movie would be my last, really.
Hillary Clinton has taken some fire over 40 years of her fight for families and children. How does she do it? That's what I want to know. Where does she get her grit and her grace? Where do any of our female firsts, our pathbreakers, where do they find that strength?
Leave me to the thing I love. I love acting. But being called 'the greatest living actress' - a designation not even my mother would sanction - is the opposite of good or valuable or useful. It is a curse for a working actor.
I can't do a lot of things, like golf. I don't like golf. I mean, I really don't, because I tend to like things that I can do right away. If I can't do it right away, I don't like it.
Men should look at the world as if something is wrong when their voices predominate. They should feel it.
I have a very clear understanding of what my voice is. It's like a B voice. It hovers around B-minus, B-plus. I have great friends who are wonderful singers, and I know I'll never be able to do that. But singing through a character is something I can do.
I think we all think we sound really good in the shower, where there's that nice reverb, and the water's drowning you out, and there is some liberation in the freedom of being totally alone and really going for it.
You can't strategize falling in love, can you? It's never worked. People love you the most and set you up, and it doesn't work because you can't predict these things. You fall in love serially.
Disney, who brought joy, arguably, to billions of people, was, perhaps, or had some... racist proclivities. He formed and supported an anti-Semitic industry lobby. And he was certainly, on the evidence of his company's policies, a gender bigot.
When I was a kid, when I was 16, 17, I'd come home from high school, and my dad collected all of Barbra Streisand's records. And she was very young then. I think she probably had three records out, and she was 21, and we had them all. And I knew every single song, every breath, every elision, every swell. And I sang along to it.
The great gift of human beings is that we have the power of empathy.
I go to a lot of movies where people are all around me laughing, and I feel like I'm from outer space because I find it dangerous and stupid and horrible and degrading to women and all these things.
It's a good thing to imagine yourself doing something you think you can't. I do that every day because, basically, if I had it my way, I'd just stay home and think about what I'm having for supper.
I was offered, within one year, three different witch roles. It was almost like the world was saying - or the studios were saying - 'We don't know what to do with you.'
I have a very busy life, and not many people who have a career and four kids go out a lot to the movies.
I know movies are a function of our dream world. And when you project yourself on screen, it's easier to project yourself into what you were, not what you are.
It's bizarre that the produce manager is more important to my children's health than the pediatrician.
I think that you find your own way… In the end, it’s what feels right to you. Not what your mother told you. Not what some actress told you. Not what anybody else told you but the still, small voice.
Don't waste so much time thinking about how much you weigh. There is no more mind-numbing, boring, idiotic, self-destructive diversion from the fun of living.
The minute you start caring about what other people think, is the minute you stop being yourself.
I'm a pain in the ass to all of the costume designers with whom I work because I have very strong feelings about the subject.
True freedom is understanding that we have a choice in who and what we allow to have power over us.
It is well that the earth is round that we do not see too far ahead.
It’s good to push yourself and do what you don’t necessarily want to do, that if you’re not automatically good at it, you should try it. Trying is so important.
The work is the most fun; it seems illicit how much fun it is.
My advice: don’t waste so much time worrying about your skin or your weight. Develop what you do, what you put your hands on in the world.
What does it take to be the first female anything? It takes grit, and it takes grace.
The formula of happiness and success is just being actually yourself, in the most vivid possible way you can.
Chris Cooper is one of my favorite actors in the world. I've seen him in most everything he's done.
Power, influence, strength — all those things can overpower what’s important in life. But as long as you have food and shelter over your head, if the necessities are taken care of, what makes us happy on top of that is very simple.
Everything we say signifies; everything counts, that we put out into the world. It impacts on kids, it impacts on the zeitgeist of the time.
Put blinders onto those things that conspire to hold you back, especially the ones in your own head.
Obsession is an attractive thing. People who are really, really interested and good at one thing and smart are attractive, if they're men.
As there begins to be less time ahead of you, you want to be exactly who you are, without making it easier for everyone else.
Service is the only thing that's important about love. Everybody is worried about 'losing yourself' - all this narcissism. Duty. We can't stand that idea now either... But duty might be a suit of armor you put on to fight for your love.
People will say to me, ‘You’ve played so many strong women’ and I’ll say, ‘Have you ever said to a man, ‘You’ve played so many strong men?’
You win an Oscar, it can double the audience that you had before.
You can't suppress the things that make us human. It's pointless to try.
I'm thrilled when I get nominated. I don't count how many and I don't remember how many I've had. I just know it's a lot.
Integrate what you believe in every single area of your life. Take your heart to work and ask the most and best of everybody else, too.
I get a trickling few scripts that I'm lucky enough that some of them are great. I don't get loads of scripts.
The more you are in this business, the more humbled by it you become.
Some people are filled by compassion and a desire to do good, and some simply don't think anything's going to make a difference.
We are who we're going to be when we're very old, and when we're very old we are who we were when we were 8.
I have four to five months, tops, per year to give to my acting work.
I want to feel my life while I'm in it.
There are wonderfully talented actresses. It's a really rich field. There isn't as rich a field of material.
I'm curious about other people. That's the essence of my acting. I'm interested in what it would be like to be you.
People say, When you have children, everything changes. But maybe things are awakened that were already there.
Instant gratification is not soon enough.
I always feel like I can't do it, that I can't go through with a movie. But then I do go through with it after all.
Interestingly, young people don't come to you for advice. Especially the ones who are related to you.
I didn't have any confidence in my beauty when I was young. I felt like a character actress, and I still do.
I don't like to be gone all weekend and at night too. Because for 20 years, I've had children who are in school.
I can't stand most things that I see.
Donnerstag, 7. Juni 2018
Happy Birthday Karl Urban!
There's only so much artistic output that I can actually expel at any one given time.
I'm high energy.
I've got a New Zealand film coming out here called Out of the Blue. It's a very heavy story, and it's the first time I've played a character who is alive.
It's such a small industry here you inevitably end up working with the same people over and over again. There are only so many actors to go around, which is good for us.
I just really hope that Peter Jackson and New Line Cinema can resolve all their differences. I'm hoping that's going to happen, but we'd have to wait and see. I would love to explore Middle Earth again with Peter.
I was a fan of the 'Dredd' comics when I was a teenager.
A lot of the ancient Norse myths and legends are the basis of a lot of the sci-fi, fantasy films out there. Telling these stories in a contemporary medium, it's all good.
It was always something I knew I was capable of and from an early age my mother was involved in the film industry. She used to work at a production company. So I was exposed to a renaissance period of films in New Zealand back in the early 80's.
Russell Means is quite a legend in the Indian community for what he's been able to achieve. It was a real honor to work with a guy who's been on the front lines of fighting for what he believes in.
If I read a script and find it engaging and I start making choices in my mind on how to approach the work, than that's a good indication that it is something worth pursuing.
When you pick up a script and you can't stop reading it because it's a real page-turner, that's a good sign.
I'll need every ounce that I have to drive it through. Film and TV require that energy. Sometimes fight scenes can be pretty intense. When I was shooting 'Heaven' it was truly guerrilla film-making.
I like the timeframe involved in being an actor.
There's only so much you can do until you get on set and see the aesthetics of what you're dealing with. Then you see what the other players are giving to you. It's all about the transfer of energy between different actors.
I never envisioned when I was reading that comic as a 17-year-old that I would have the opportunity to actually play the character.
When I work, I try to eat as much vegetarian as possible. When I do Cupid, I eat vegetarian because I need the energy. I've got those wings on my back.
I've always wanted to do a Western.
That's always an interesting concept when you try to make your dream into a reality and you come up against the facts of exactly what it is you're attempting to do.
Moon Bloodgood is so dedicated, and I was impressed with her dedication. She was put into some grueling situations - cold, freezing, thrown into mud puddles, cold mountains and she didn't complain once. A lot of actresses would have said, 'Ok, that's a half-hour reset for my hair and make-up' and she didn't; she stuck with it.
That is a big danger, losing your inspiration. When I work in film and television I try to do each take a little differently. I never want to do the same thing twice, because then you're not being spontaneous, you're just recreating something.
I decided to have a regular childhood and not pursue until I left school, although I wrote plays, directed plays, and got involved in theatre at school. When I left school I decided that's that I was going to pursue and gave it a crack.
Nothing beats a great smile.
Invest in yourself. It's like being a boxer, you've got to be in training so that when the bell rings, you get your direction you come out of the corner and you're *ready*. Do not let the audition be the first thing you've done in six months.
My philosophy is whatever you do, you've got to invest in yourself. If you don't, there are a lot of people out there who will get the job because they're more prepared than you.
One of the crazy things about our job is that we get taught these insane skills that we could never use in real life.
Now I'm this far up the ladder and I've got so much farther to go with what I want to achieve with it.
Sometimes it's nice to know that what you've done has been appreciated.
When you work so hard on making a film, it's all worthwhile when you get to experience seeing that film with an audience who thoroughly enjoy it and react to the movie.
I've turned down a lot of stuff. I've read several scripts and said "That's not me, I'm not interested in doing that." It's got to be something that inspires me and captures my imagination. I want to be able to say "There's a challenge.".
I don't see a benefit in accepting every single little morsel of work that comes along because I think, in essence, what you're doing is you're raping yourself really.
I am in awe, in admiration of the man who Gaius Julius Caesar was. I don't actually do him as the man himself. He is maybe a distant relative. It's hard to approach the real man because he is such an awesome icon.
I don't believe I could work as effectively at what I do without the support of my wife.
I would think, as an actor, it's just much more fun to be the bad guy.
I did a little theatre work after that and the following year I got another part in a television series. Then it was almost to the end of the year before I got more work. That was coming to terms with the reality of the vocation I had chosen.
If I can find something that I haven't done before, then that is an immediate...it peaks my interest.
I love fishing and surfing, and I work out every day.
Yeah, I played video games on and off for quite a few years. I played Doom and was a fan of the game and that was my prime reason for doing the film.
I'm high energy.
I've got a New Zealand film coming out here called Out of the Blue. It's a very heavy story, and it's the first time I've played a character who is alive.
It's such a small industry here you inevitably end up working with the same people over and over again. There are only so many actors to go around, which is good for us.
I just really hope that Peter Jackson and New Line Cinema can resolve all their differences. I'm hoping that's going to happen, but we'd have to wait and see. I would love to explore Middle Earth again with Peter.
I was a fan of the 'Dredd' comics when I was a teenager.
A lot of the ancient Norse myths and legends are the basis of a lot of the sci-fi, fantasy films out there. Telling these stories in a contemporary medium, it's all good.
It was always something I knew I was capable of and from an early age my mother was involved in the film industry. She used to work at a production company. So I was exposed to a renaissance period of films in New Zealand back in the early 80's.
Russell Means is quite a legend in the Indian community for what he's been able to achieve. It was a real honor to work with a guy who's been on the front lines of fighting for what he believes in.
If I read a script and find it engaging and I start making choices in my mind on how to approach the work, than that's a good indication that it is something worth pursuing.
When you pick up a script and you can't stop reading it because it's a real page-turner, that's a good sign.
I'll need every ounce that I have to drive it through. Film and TV require that energy. Sometimes fight scenes can be pretty intense. When I was shooting 'Heaven' it was truly guerrilla film-making.
I like the timeframe involved in being an actor.
There's only so much you can do until you get on set and see the aesthetics of what you're dealing with. Then you see what the other players are giving to you. It's all about the transfer of energy between different actors.
I never envisioned when I was reading that comic as a 17-year-old that I would have the opportunity to actually play the character.
When I work, I try to eat as much vegetarian as possible. When I do Cupid, I eat vegetarian because I need the energy. I've got those wings on my back.
I've always wanted to do a Western.
That's always an interesting concept when you try to make your dream into a reality and you come up against the facts of exactly what it is you're attempting to do.
Moon Bloodgood is so dedicated, and I was impressed with her dedication. She was put into some grueling situations - cold, freezing, thrown into mud puddles, cold mountains and she didn't complain once. A lot of actresses would have said, 'Ok, that's a half-hour reset for my hair and make-up' and she didn't; she stuck with it.
That is a big danger, losing your inspiration. When I work in film and television I try to do each take a little differently. I never want to do the same thing twice, because then you're not being spontaneous, you're just recreating something.
I decided to have a regular childhood and not pursue until I left school, although I wrote plays, directed plays, and got involved in theatre at school. When I left school I decided that's that I was going to pursue and gave it a crack.
Nothing beats a great smile.
Invest in yourself. It's like being a boxer, you've got to be in training so that when the bell rings, you get your direction you come out of the corner and you're *ready*. Do not let the audition be the first thing you've done in six months.
My philosophy is whatever you do, you've got to invest in yourself. If you don't, there are a lot of people out there who will get the job because they're more prepared than you.
One of the crazy things about our job is that we get taught these insane skills that we could never use in real life.
Now I'm this far up the ladder and I've got so much farther to go with what I want to achieve with it.
Sometimes it's nice to know that what you've done has been appreciated.
When you work so hard on making a film, it's all worthwhile when you get to experience seeing that film with an audience who thoroughly enjoy it and react to the movie.
I've turned down a lot of stuff. I've read several scripts and said "That's not me, I'm not interested in doing that." It's got to be something that inspires me and captures my imagination. I want to be able to say "There's a challenge.".
I don't see a benefit in accepting every single little morsel of work that comes along because I think, in essence, what you're doing is you're raping yourself really.
I am in awe, in admiration of the man who Gaius Julius Caesar was. I don't actually do him as the man himself. He is maybe a distant relative. It's hard to approach the real man because he is such an awesome icon.
I don't believe I could work as effectively at what I do without the support of my wife.
I would think, as an actor, it's just much more fun to be the bad guy.
I did a little theatre work after that and the following year I got another part in a television series. Then it was almost to the end of the year before I got more work. That was coming to terms with the reality of the vocation I had chosen.
If I can find something that I haven't done before, then that is an immediate...it peaks my interest.
I love fishing and surfing, and I work out every day.
Yeah, I played video games on and off for quite a few years. I played Doom and was a fan of the game and that was my prime reason for doing the film.
Mittwoch, 6. Juni 2018
Happy Birthday Jason Isaacs!
I was terrified of being bland around all these incredible actors. I was around the royal family of British actors! I asked for the wig, the robes. They wanted me in a suit with ordinary hair. I tried to come up with the voice, because Alan Rickman, the greatest screen villain certainly of our age — I knew he was in it so I had to come up with a voice I thought that sounded like finger nails on a blackboard. I wanted a voice that irritated you in one syllable.
I am not a sex symbol.
There is a very recognizable racist and supremacist, acting out of fear and thinking that the past was a better time. And scared of Muggles and scared of the future because it feels like his place was some time ago, when he was part of the super-elite who could look down on the rest of the world. You don’t need to look too far to find many politicians standing on those platforms. Those issues are never more relevant than today, but they are dealt with in this kind of magical world.
I don't know if it's a romantic comedy but I'm in the beginning of the first of the season of 'The West Wing.' We shot it last year. I don't know. If anyone asks me to be in one, I'll jump on it.
No, no it was the opposite—the very, very opposite. That's the stuff that made me not want to do it. If someone said to me, ‘We're remaking The Godfather,' I'd sprint a million miles in the other direction across broken glass. Remaking something, I think is pointless, something that's been done so well before. So, the new story, for our times, reflective of stuff going on in the streets and the newspapers, that's told in a very—I thought—a very dynamic and interesting way with lots of twists and turns, I was able to forget entirely, when I read the story, that there had ever been a Star Trek before.
I'm still spending my working life trying to mine people's souls and now they're complimenting me in reviews on the amount of time I spend in the gym. On the definition of my triceps.
He's fighting on behalf of an organization for whom that's not true yet. They haven't taken on board that they're going to lose and everyone will die. He does understand that. He's seen death on a large scale before. He takes her, he redirects her from the fate she was facing because he needs someone by his side who's going to do what's necessary, when it's necessary and hopefully have loyalty to him because he's the one that gave her a second chance. Although that's questionable because Burnham is so guilt-stricken by what she's done. Does he have a secret agenda? Yeah, to win the war. Unlike other captain's before…he's keeps a certain authoritative distance between him and the crew because he thinks that's how they respond to best to the chain of command. He carries his own burden of things he's done, things he hopes to do, doubts—his own insecurities and doubts.
I think I was probably always a liar; I just get paid for it now.
Well, you know, he's brought this woman on board to be a crewmember because he's got to try and win a war slightly hamstrung. He's on a science vessel with a of peacetime explorer crew, not people who are trying to fight. The rules of engagement such as they are—remember these are not the ones from the original series, this is 10 years before—the Federation directives are different, and they're peacetime directives, but he's fighting an ruthless and immoral—not amoral—enemy who will do anything they need to do and take any measure necessary.
When I came back from filming 'Abduction', I told my agent: I'm staying in London now. If it takes doing children's theater from the back of a van in Kilburn, that's OK. I need to be with my family. My job is to keep the family together and provide for them.
Oh my god, if they were going to learn something? I hope they'd read a couple of op/ed columns or maybe a bumper sticker and some fridge magnets. I hope they'll be entertained…The best way you can influence people and help them make good choices in their life…it's just by telling a great story and subliminally, whatever the message or affect you're going to have on people works under the surface. It's a cracking plot start to finish and it should have you kind of leaning forward off the chair and not wanting to miss it.
And then the same thing Gene Rodenberry set out to do in the ‘60s when there was such terrible strife and unrest in the streets, we're presenting, not at the center of our show as part of the message, but just as part of the almost by osmosis you take on the notion that there may be a time where we can work together across gender, race and even species in our show and certainly sexuality and all these other things—and work together in our collective best interests. Obviously this is coming at a time where there are people trying to make us work against each other and separate us from each other.
It's just really, really beautiful. Each scene is one long 15 minute take without cutting. My scene is with Robin Wright-Penn so I'm pretty excited about that.
He's barefoot. I'm not even beginning to play in that arena. You start to think like that, you might as well not go to work. I've got a war to win, I've got a crew to try and save and I've got a Federation to manipulate. It's hard to give even a nanosecond's thought to the genius that was, for instance, that I grew up in awe of, I wouldn't have gone to work. I wouldn't take the job if they didn't have an original story, a kind of single rich, layered, textured 15-hour story for me to jump in and be part of, I don't think I would've done it either because I absolutely worshiped the original series…it was a huge part of my childhood television viewing.
The idea of doing some kind of pale reboot of it, or kind of an echo of it, it would be an anathema to me. So, it's up to other people to decide in the future where I will live or not live in the pantheon of those greats. I'm just happy to strap a phaser on.
I went to university and I was a bit out of my depth, socially.
Well, actually, there's a bunch of tension between us. I'm trying to earn her trust and she is filled with both guilt and fear and suspicion. What Sonequa and I had to do was work very hard not to show what we're like off screen because we're having a fantastic time off screen. We have a very good mutual friend who's in The Walking Dead, plus Sonequa organizes these game nights when the entire cast bond. I host them at the house. We adore each other's company and make each other laugh, whereas Burnham is very poker-faced and doesn't respond to any of Lorca's jokes and we have to be suspicious of each other. So acting sometimes is about trying to not like each other on screen.
Acting is usually regarded as a wholly narcissistic pursuit but there really is a hunger in me to unravel the human condition.
I didn't sit in the chair. That was my first experience–I'm not going to sit in the chair. I've seen too many scenes with people sitting in the chair and we're at war and there are missiles being fired. I went right down to the front by the screen and I looked up at it, and I engaged with it like the missiles were instruments in my orchestra. I stood and I conducted the war. That became a template for me for a number of episodes because I felt like he's a very active guy. This guy doesn't like to stand still, he likes to be doing stuff, he'd like to be fighting hand-to-hand.
He's frustrated by the ship, which is a science vessel, it has some weapons, it has some shields, but it's not built for war. If I could will it forward, like The Flintstones, if I could give it an extra mile an hour by pushing it, I would do it. So I just stayed out of the chair for as long as I could and I finally had to sit in the chair because of a scene where it wasn't really active, nothing much was happening, so they tend to sit down. I felt like I'd earned it.
In the moment of acting you don't feel like anything, you feel like the person, as much as you can.
No, I mean, I like to use sports analogies and tennis is the sport I play: When I watch players walk onto center court in Wimbledon and there's no reason at all that they can't beat the other person and hold their own, and they collapse completely because the occasion is too much for them, and caring that weight and expectation on their shoulders. I've been along long enough to cast it all of and whilst I have the deepest respect for all the fans and I love the ones I've met so far and the amazing actors who have gone before, I deliberately concentrated on not giving a f—k and I came on and played.
I know there's a whole bunch of people back in Hollywood who are obsessed with canon and with detail about what you can and can't do, and wear and point and press, but I shrugged all that off and arrived as if this was the very first scene in the very first Star Trek ever filmed. That's the only way you can play anything.
Every time I make a plan, God laughs at me.
Peter Pan didn’t do very well at the box office at all, but people who have got little kids phone me all the time and go: ‘I’m so fucking sick of seeing your face. My daughter’s been playing it all weekend.’ It’s a beautiful film.
I imagine like most of us that I'd like obscene amounts of money but the people I met and worked with who have those obscene amounts of money and have obscene amounts of fame have awful lives. Really. I mean hideously compromised lives.
I was pretty sure that Armando had got the wrong address, that he was sending the script off to Jason Bateman or Jason Statham. Presumably, someone more expensive wasn’t available.
Acting is a really simple job - it's just hard to do. You just have to be that person with their background in that situation. That's all it is. My kids do it all the time when they're dressing up and playing games.
In real life, Zhukov was the only person who was able to speak bluntly to Stalin. So, I thought, well, who are the bluntest people I’ve ever met in my life? They’re all from Yorkshire. The accent is shorthand for: no fucking around, I’m going to tell you what’s what. I had a picture of Brian Glover in my head. Magnificent actor.
It seems a bit weird to call someone your girlfriend when you have a child.
I just think I’m rubbish. I can’t believe people don’t go, ‘I’m so sorry, we’ve made a terrible mistake for the last 30 years. Please go and open a cake shop.’
I could release myself into acting in a way that I was not released socially.
Everybody took the piss out of me when I got to London. I couldn’t understand why, but I went full Ray Winstone. Then I went to university and they all sounded like Hugh Grant and, within a day, I sounded like them, or as best I could. I still have that social disease and I’m not aware I’m doing it.
But, luckily, I’ve been able to sell it.
I get some of the nicest fan mail you could imagine. Also when I'm up for an award, my fans all vote online and then they'll boast to each other about how many thousands of times they've clicked my name. Their thumbs must be bleeding!
I was an original series fan, what they call ‘TOS’ in the biz. Kirk represented everything that a man was or ought to be. He was brilliant, fearless, mischievous, flirty. He was swaggering. But then Spock was the other side of me, too, which was cooler, cautious and sarcastic.
Well, he's not going to get any nicer. He's a genocidal racist maniac. He's one of these people who thinks the world was a great place when Voldemort ruled the world. He's particularly offended by mixed-blood Mudbloods, the product of wizards and humans. So I hope he goes into therapy.
It’s often absurd, but then I’m not quite sure what else I could do.
I damaged my Achilles tendon, so I can't run.
He didn’t say things that were very far from it! He was watching Boris – having stabbed him in the back – being stabbed in the front by Gove, and then everyone else stabbing Gove until Theresa May was the last woman standing. The blood was fresh.
I imagine like most of us that I'd like obscene amounts of money but the people I met and worked with who have those obscene amounts of money and have obscene amounts of fame have awful lives. Really. I mean hideously compromised lives. And I can go anywhere. No one knows who I am.
I kind of love their passion. I love when they hate the show, or they say they hate the show and it’s always for some minute technical detail. It’s exciting to be at the centre of those kinds of scholarly rows.
God, I hate interviews with actors pouncing on. Who wants to know about their lives? I don't want to know about Al Pacino's life.
That’s Armando’s gift for political satire. You could have released this film at any time in the last 100 years, and probably release it in the next few hundred years, provided Trump doesn’t annihilate us all, and it would seem perfectly apposite.
I'm at the beginning of it. I'm Elektra's last job before the story kicks off.
I am the recipient of an awful lot of trolling from rightwing hate groups hiding behind some bizarre pretence of being fans. They say they’re not going to watch it because I make anti-Trump pronouncements. Then I click on their timelines and it’s nothing but white supremacist stuff.
I think this show I'm going to do,' Awake,' if it's done well, will not only be provocative and entertaining, but help people. I want to do that.
I think women need to be behind the camera, holding the pen and the purse-strings, too. What I wouldn’t recommend, for my daughters or any young men, is to be waiting for the phone to ring, to be picked because of what you look like, or the feeling that people get when you walk in the room. Control the story yourself.
There is nothing nicer than playing someone who is cooler, tougher, more virtuous and sexier than yourself and thinking, 'I can be anyone.'
I was talking to David Cameron and when I told him what I was doing, he could barely contain his surprise and horror and joy at how the film’s story paralleled exactly what was going on in Downing Street. There’s no message to the film, but you get from it that politicians seeking power should almost by definition be precluded from obtaining power. They’re all so venal and self-serving and immature and ruthless.
When I started acting, I thought everything should be issue-based and that there should be a helpline at the end of every program.
Look, I play all these tough guys and thugs and strong, complex characters. In real life, I am a cringing, neurotic Jewish mess. Can't I for once play that on stage?
I went off and read the books after the audition and I read all four books in one sitting - you know - didn't wash, didn't eat, drove around with them on the steering wheel like a lunatic. I suddenly understood why my friends, who I'd thought where slightly backward, had been so addicted to these children's books. They're like crack.
I would love to tell you I've found the secret to eternal youth. I go to the gym and avoid too many chips. I love to eat, hate to work out, but if you can't count all your ribs from a distance you're considered obese.
This wasn't just a sitcom. It was like watching a five-act Ibsen play. Corbett was making us laugh, but we were laughing at his pain and the hopelessness of his situation. Then there were the story lines ... politics, class, religion, sex. This wasn't what an early-1960s comedy was supposed to deal with. Everybody knows his Steptoe voice, but that was nothing like his real voice. He was actually raised in Wythenshawe. He had that peculiar northern thing of trying to make his accent posher than it was. A bit like Harold, really. So much of his real life mirrored Steptoe and I think Galton and Simpson picked up on that. Unfortunately, typecasting was far more prevalent in those days. Harry H. Corbett was, without doubt, the finest actor in the country, but the more successful he was as Steptoe, the less work he was offered. He wanted to walk away, but he couldn't. He was very comfortably trapped. I've got mates who are in exactly the same situation. Starring in hugely successful shows, earning loads of money - but they can't stand their jobs. The country loved Harold Steptoe, but Corbett hated him. Really hated him.
I can't tell you too much about it because I'm not even meant to tell you that I'm in it. In fact, I might never work again now that I've been talking to you. I'm not in it for very long, let's put it that way.
I don’t mean to sound irreverent when I say I don’t care about the die-hard Trek fans. I only ‘don’t care’ about them in the sense that I know they’re all going to watch anyway. I look forward to having the fun of them being outraged, so they can sit up all night and talk about it with each other.
I got into shape because I took kick-boxing lessons every day to prepare for a fight scene with Taylor Lautner. I really wanted to lie down and eat Chinese food, but I kick-boxed every morning and ran. If someone was filming you with your kit off, you'd do the same thing.
It was a combination of a teacher from drama school who would constantly whisper in this very high voice, ‘You’ll amount to nothing, Isaacs. You will never work,’ and this British art critic, Brian Sewell. The director Chris Columbus, would come up to me and say, ‘So we had that take, it’s great, but could we do one more where you pull back on the voice like 80-90 percent?
Both a dementor and dementing. It would be cruelly hilarious if it was your uncle talking about a present they gave him in the care home, less so when the future of mankind depends on his ability to make decisions not based on his cock, his ratings or his bile.
#TrumpInWonderland
Actually Weinstein produced 326 movies, many of them iconic, but even had he cured cancer it wouldn't make sexual assault ok. My point was that his livelihood, reputation and freedom (possibly) are the price, whereas the pussy-grabber-in-chief wreaks his casual carnage untouched.
Charging my gadgets up for the flight home I relapsed and glimpsed. My feed seems to be all Trump and Weinstein. One's accused of multiple sexual assaults and is known to be a lying crook who cheated, stole and bullied his way through life. The other made 'Shakespeare in Love'.
That's how a real President writes on a day to remember the fallen. That's how anyone other than an narcissistic, racist, sexist sociopath would write. I was avoiding social media while on holiday with my family, but his toxic narcissism reached across the ocean and shook me.
RT Obama
You 'hereby demand' it on Twitter, do you, you pretentious, pig-ignorant parody of a prick? Then you'll make it official tomorrow? How exactly...parchment and quill? Skywriting? If you were investigated it's because there were and are grounds for it, but you know that don't you?
RT Trump
Because I twat about in make-up for a job, met these extraordinary folk today from the European Space Agency; they fly rockets, monitor probes, and collaborate with 22 countries to head off catastrophe and plan our best future. So it's doable then. Toldya.
There are very few problems in the world that couldn't be solved if we all just married Prince Harry.
Obama was desperate for reform of the gun laws, genuinely distraught by the loss of life and consistent in his dealings with the NRA. Know your history before you tweeze your dick around in the wind. And the slaughter of innocents isn't a game. Not to me.
God bless all? That's your best shot at a solution? You impotent, morally bankrupt, compassionless conman. You'll move on to praising the emergency services with a back-slapping exclamation mark before the bodies are cold.
RT Trump
Sometimes sharing one of #Trump's repulsive actions or statements feels like standing in a tsunami of sewage and pointlessly plucking out a single turd. But then I see genius like this and am reminded that every small gesture might bear fruit.
To the 40 kids going to my house for a party tonight: Lucius Malfoy's place, eh? What fun. Sorry I won't be there to meet you. I know where you all live too, btw. Touch any of my stuff and I'll kill you where you sleep.
Articulate and cogent argument from #Obama . Worth reading to be painfully reminded what a humble leader should sound like, why withdrawal from the Iran deal is catastrophic and to stock up on enough water, batteries and Sudoko to last though the fallout.
So there it is. #Trump just pulled out. If only his father had.
What kind of voters would trust #CaptainLorca? The kind that want to Make the Empire Great Again I guess. Would that they were only 3% in the world of porn-stars, putin-pleasuring and pee-pee-pals.
How curious that you follow me (and other left-of-centre celebs) and your feed is chock full of you doing precisely that: knocking Britain in every way. I don't dismiss your opinions because you're not a citizen, but because they're bigoted, ignorant and excremental
#TrollThis
Trump's America. If he stopped watching television all morning, stopped huddling with lawyers to work out what lies to tell next and stopped playing golf every weekend, his brief reign might be less of a shameful shitshow. Probably not.
#LiarsJenga #LastBricks
Always hope to go down well in the Nether regions.
#TheDeathofStalin
#ItllKnockYourClogsOff
So ironic and appropriate that on these petty, sordid details a petty, sordid dynasty might fall. Giuliani's clearly either a double agent or a total moron. Both, probably.
What a winning team.
#TheMightyFucks
Ouch. How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless Canadian.
#Logical
#KingLeer
#StarTrek
The pathological, terrifying thing is that he doesn't know he's lying anymore. It's first nature. He wouldn't know the truth if it indicted, impeached, convicted, imprisoned, shaved, shamed and shat on him.
But he will.
#ItTollsForTheeFuckwit
British politicians brought low by a lethal combination of volcanic hypocritical flatulence and hubristic testicular giantisis. Twats.
#PleaseNeverStopDoingThis
Hurry up! We all need a distraction from the terrestrial madness and an optimistic vision of the future, even if we'll all be wearing giant blue Spanx bodysuits with no pockets.
#StarTrekDiscovery
There's been a body without a brain in the White House for nearly 18 months now.
If you thought we'd seen crazy before, think again: #Trump's 30 minute unhinged call in to #FoxAndFriends proves that he's off his meds, off his tree and needs to be off the island.
#StreamOfUnconsciousness
I know there are and have been many worse people in the world, but I'm struggling to think of any right now.
#OrangeSupremacist
Let's listen to 99% of the scientific experts who confirm a climate change crisis, let's get every nation together to make a plan, then let's elect a neanderthal luddite to sabotage all environmental protection, domestic and international. Wait...looks odd written down
#EarthDay
Clearly people of exquisite taste. They must be the toast of St Mungo's.
God there's some bollocks passing for expertise on the internet:
It's a Yorkshire accent, because the character's blunt, uncouth and offensive and Yorkshiremen are, er, famously...articulate. And no-one has Russian accents coz we're speaking our 1st language. Da?
Let's not forget that lifelong racist @realDonaldTrump also called for the execution of the Central Park 5 AFTER they were proved innocent by DNA evidence. His father and the rest of his KKK cohorts would be so proud.
Glorious, hilarious metaphor for The Trump presidency, the Brexit campaign and my attempts to be a cool dad.
"Breeding"? Like animals? Like jews were breeding in the Warsaw ghetto? Like slaves? Like Irish Catholics were accused of, Mexicans, any group in history who've been victimised and dehumanised and villified? Your rhetoric (look it up) shames us all, as does your presidency #Trump
Fiery, passionate and chilling. Thank you to @JohnMannMP and those members of all parties who are prepared to fight #Antisemitism head on. Never thought I'd see the day, but then who thought we'd see the day that the #POTUS supported white supremacists and Russian gangsters?
So fantastically childish it's made my day. Dear dear darling @JeffBezos please send him twice as many tomorrow and I'll sign up for prime in every country I go to.
Just sat next to Bill, who told me that god created Adam 6000 years ago. When I asked if he believed the scientists who can date human bones older than that he told me that was pre-Adam man, an entirely different creature. Aha.
#BeamMeUpNOW
Now THIS is what you call a representative. A speech. It's Mark Anthony in Julius Caesar. Jack Nicholson in A Few Good Men. Trump in never a billion years of his wildest, wettest dreams.
Ew.
My bad. Just spent a rancid 2 minutes trudging through the alimentary canal of your feed. Anyone who retweets Anne Coulter, Nigel Farage, the Liar-in-chief, Katie Hopkins etc while spewing offense at the vulnerable and compassionate in every direction is just a hate-filled coward
Sunday's MustSeeTV: Trumplethinskin laid bare (eugh) as the lying, immoral, ignorant, sexist, self-obsessed bully we know him to be and the great @RealLennieJames relaunches #FearTheWalkingDead like an Apollo mission. Still miss #StarTrek's optimism though
Bit of a digital antidote to the negativity. Is it heartwarming or actually inspiring? Up to you. I'm asking myself what can I do this Sunday morning to be of service. Maybe it's money, maybe it's time, maybe it's expertise. What have you got?
Struggling to join the dots: a cornered trump, scared of a politically suicidal attempt to fire his prosecutors, discovers concern for Syrian victims (though won't let them immigrate) and threatens Russia with his latest wartoys. Nope. Don't see it. He's just a big hearted hero.
You lucky lucky man. Take good care of my beautiful DSC family, they're some of the nicest, most talented and woke folk this side of Alpha Centauri (though cook for them and they'll lie on their backs like dogs). Enjoy.
#LLAPInTheRatings
#MyChair
I am not a sex symbol.
There is a very recognizable racist and supremacist, acting out of fear and thinking that the past was a better time. And scared of Muggles and scared of the future because it feels like his place was some time ago, when he was part of the super-elite who could look down on the rest of the world. You don’t need to look too far to find many politicians standing on those platforms. Those issues are never more relevant than today, but they are dealt with in this kind of magical world.
I don't know if it's a romantic comedy but I'm in the beginning of the first of the season of 'The West Wing.' We shot it last year. I don't know. If anyone asks me to be in one, I'll jump on it.
No, no it was the opposite—the very, very opposite. That's the stuff that made me not want to do it. If someone said to me, ‘We're remaking The Godfather,' I'd sprint a million miles in the other direction across broken glass. Remaking something, I think is pointless, something that's been done so well before. So, the new story, for our times, reflective of stuff going on in the streets and the newspapers, that's told in a very—I thought—a very dynamic and interesting way with lots of twists and turns, I was able to forget entirely, when I read the story, that there had ever been a Star Trek before.
I'm still spending my working life trying to mine people's souls and now they're complimenting me in reviews on the amount of time I spend in the gym. On the definition of my triceps.
He's fighting on behalf of an organization for whom that's not true yet. They haven't taken on board that they're going to lose and everyone will die. He does understand that. He's seen death on a large scale before. He takes her, he redirects her from the fate she was facing because he needs someone by his side who's going to do what's necessary, when it's necessary and hopefully have loyalty to him because he's the one that gave her a second chance. Although that's questionable because Burnham is so guilt-stricken by what she's done. Does he have a secret agenda? Yeah, to win the war. Unlike other captain's before…he's keeps a certain authoritative distance between him and the crew because he thinks that's how they respond to best to the chain of command. He carries his own burden of things he's done, things he hopes to do, doubts—his own insecurities and doubts.
I think I was probably always a liar; I just get paid for it now.
Well, you know, he's brought this woman on board to be a crewmember because he's got to try and win a war slightly hamstrung. He's on a science vessel with a of peacetime explorer crew, not people who are trying to fight. The rules of engagement such as they are—remember these are not the ones from the original series, this is 10 years before—the Federation directives are different, and they're peacetime directives, but he's fighting an ruthless and immoral—not amoral—enemy who will do anything they need to do and take any measure necessary.
When I came back from filming 'Abduction', I told my agent: I'm staying in London now. If it takes doing children's theater from the back of a van in Kilburn, that's OK. I need to be with my family. My job is to keep the family together and provide for them.
Oh my god, if they were going to learn something? I hope they'd read a couple of op/ed columns or maybe a bumper sticker and some fridge magnets. I hope they'll be entertained…The best way you can influence people and help them make good choices in their life…it's just by telling a great story and subliminally, whatever the message or affect you're going to have on people works under the surface. It's a cracking plot start to finish and it should have you kind of leaning forward off the chair and not wanting to miss it.
And then the same thing Gene Rodenberry set out to do in the ‘60s when there was such terrible strife and unrest in the streets, we're presenting, not at the center of our show as part of the message, but just as part of the almost by osmosis you take on the notion that there may be a time where we can work together across gender, race and even species in our show and certainly sexuality and all these other things—and work together in our collective best interests. Obviously this is coming at a time where there are people trying to make us work against each other and separate us from each other.
It's just really, really beautiful. Each scene is one long 15 minute take without cutting. My scene is with Robin Wright-Penn so I'm pretty excited about that.
He's barefoot. I'm not even beginning to play in that arena. You start to think like that, you might as well not go to work. I've got a war to win, I've got a crew to try and save and I've got a Federation to manipulate. It's hard to give even a nanosecond's thought to the genius that was, for instance, that I grew up in awe of, I wouldn't have gone to work. I wouldn't take the job if they didn't have an original story, a kind of single rich, layered, textured 15-hour story for me to jump in and be part of, I don't think I would've done it either because I absolutely worshiped the original series…it was a huge part of my childhood television viewing.
The idea of doing some kind of pale reboot of it, or kind of an echo of it, it would be an anathema to me. So, it's up to other people to decide in the future where I will live or not live in the pantheon of those greats. I'm just happy to strap a phaser on.
I went to university and I was a bit out of my depth, socially.
Well, actually, there's a bunch of tension between us. I'm trying to earn her trust and she is filled with both guilt and fear and suspicion. What Sonequa and I had to do was work very hard not to show what we're like off screen because we're having a fantastic time off screen. We have a very good mutual friend who's in The Walking Dead, plus Sonequa organizes these game nights when the entire cast bond. I host them at the house. We adore each other's company and make each other laugh, whereas Burnham is very poker-faced and doesn't respond to any of Lorca's jokes and we have to be suspicious of each other. So acting sometimes is about trying to not like each other on screen.
Acting is usually regarded as a wholly narcissistic pursuit but there really is a hunger in me to unravel the human condition.
I didn't sit in the chair. That was my first experience–I'm not going to sit in the chair. I've seen too many scenes with people sitting in the chair and we're at war and there are missiles being fired. I went right down to the front by the screen and I looked up at it, and I engaged with it like the missiles were instruments in my orchestra. I stood and I conducted the war. That became a template for me for a number of episodes because I felt like he's a very active guy. This guy doesn't like to stand still, he likes to be doing stuff, he'd like to be fighting hand-to-hand.
He's frustrated by the ship, which is a science vessel, it has some weapons, it has some shields, but it's not built for war. If I could will it forward, like The Flintstones, if I could give it an extra mile an hour by pushing it, I would do it. So I just stayed out of the chair for as long as I could and I finally had to sit in the chair because of a scene where it wasn't really active, nothing much was happening, so they tend to sit down. I felt like I'd earned it.
In the moment of acting you don't feel like anything, you feel like the person, as much as you can.
No, I mean, I like to use sports analogies and tennis is the sport I play: When I watch players walk onto center court in Wimbledon and there's no reason at all that they can't beat the other person and hold their own, and they collapse completely because the occasion is too much for them, and caring that weight and expectation on their shoulders. I've been along long enough to cast it all of and whilst I have the deepest respect for all the fans and I love the ones I've met so far and the amazing actors who have gone before, I deliberately concentrated on not giving a f—k and I came on and played.
I know there's a whole bunch of people back in Hollywood who are obsessed with canon and with detail about what you can and can't do, and wear and point and press, but I shrugged all that off and arrived as if this was the very first scene in the very first Star Trek ever filmed. That's the only way you can play anything.
Every time I make a plan, God laughs at me.
Peter Pan didn’t do very well at the box office at all, but people who have got little kids phone me all the time and go: ‘I’m so fucking sick of seeing your face. My daughter’s been playing it all weekend.’ It’s a beautiful film.
I imagine like most of us that I'd like obscene amounts of money but the people I met and worked with who have those obscene amounts of money and have obscene amounts of fame have awful lives. Really. I mean hideously compromised lives.
I was pretty sure that Armando had got the wrong address, that he was sending the script off to Jason Bateman or Jason Statham. Presumably, someone more expensive wasn’t available.
Acting is a really simple job - it's just hard to do. You just have to be that person with their background in that situation. That's all it is. My kids do it all the time when they're dressing up and playing games.
In real life, Zhukov was the only person who was able to speak bluntly to Stalin. So, I thought, well, who are the bluntest people I’ve ever met in my life? They’re all from Yorkshire. The accent is shorthand for: no fucking around, I’m going to tell you what’s what. I had a picture of Brian Glover in my head. Magnificent actor.
It seems a bit weird to call someone your girlfriend when you have a child.
I just think I’m rubbish. I can’t believe people don’t go, ‘I’m so sorry, we’ve made a terrible mistake for the last 30 years. Please go and open a cake shop.’
I could release myself into acting in a way that I was not released socially.
Everybody took the piss out of me when I got to London. I couldn’t understand why, but I went full Ray Winstone. Then I went to university and they all sounded like Hugh Grant and, within a day, I sounded like them, or as best I could. I still have that social disease and I’m not aware I’m doing it.
But, luckily, I’ve been able to sell it.
I get some of the nicest fan mail you could imagine. Also when I'm up for an award, my fans all vote online and then they'll boast to each other about how many thousands of times they've clicked my name. Their thumbs must be bleeding!
I was an original series fan, what they call ‘TOS’ in the biz. Kirk represented everything that a man was or ought to be. He was brilliant, fearless, mischievous, flirty. He was swaggering. But then Spock was the other side of me, too, which was cooler, cautious and sarcastic.
Well, he's not going to get any nicer. He's a genocidal racist maniac. He's one of these people who thinks the world was a great place when Voldemort ruled the world. He's particularly offended by mixed-blood Mudbloods, the product of wizards and humans. So I hope he goes into therapy.
It’s often absurd, but then I’m not quite sure what else I could do.
I damaged my Achilles tendon, so I can't run.
He didn’t say things that were very far from it! He was watching Boris – having stabbed him in the back – being stabbed in the front by Gove, and then everyone else stabbing Gove until Theresa May was the last woman standing. The blood was fresh.
I imagine like most of us that I'd like obscene amounts of money but the people I met and worked with who have those obscene amounts of money and have obscene amounts of fame have awful lives. Really. I mean hideously compromised lives. And I can go anywhere. No one knows who I am.
I kind of love their passion. I love when they hate the show, or they say they hate the show and it’s always for some minute technical detail. It’s exciting to be at the centre of those kinds of scholarly rows.
God, I hate interviews with actors pouncing on. Who wants to know about their lives? I don't want to know about Al Pacino's life.
That’s Armando’s gift for political satire. You could have released this film at any time in the last 100 years, and probably release it in the next few hundred years, provided Trump doesn’t annihilate us all, and it would seem perfectly apposite.
I'm at the beginning of it. I'm Elektra's last job before the story kicks off.
I am the recipient of an awful lot of trolling from rightwing hate groups hiding behind some bizarre pretence of being fans. They say they’re not going to watch it because I make anti-Trump pronouncements. Then I click on their timelines and it’s nothing but white supremacist stuff.
I think this show I'm going to do,' Awake,' if it's done well, will not only be provocative and entertaining, but help people. I want to do that.
I think women need to be behind the camera, holding the pen and the purse-strings, too. What I wouldn’t recommend, for my daughters or any young men, is to be waiting for the phone to ring, to be picked because of what you look like, or the feeling that people get when you walk in the room. Control the story yourself.
There is nothing nicer than playing someone who is cooler, tougher, more virtuous and sexier than yourself and thinking, 'I can be anyone.'
I was talking to David Cameron and when I told him what I was doing, he could barely contain his surprise and horror and joy at how the film’s story paralleled exactly what was going on in Downing Street. There’s no message to the film, but you get from it that politicians seeking power should almost by definition be precluded from obtaining power. They’re all so venal and self-serving and immature and ruthless.
When I started acting, I thought everything should be issue-based and that there should be a helpline at the end of every program.
Look, I play all these tough guys and thugs and strong, complex characters. In real life, I am a cringing, neurotic Jewish mess. Can't I for once play that on stage?
I went off and read the books after the audition and I read all four books in one sitting - you know - didn't wash, didn't eat, drove around with them on the steering wheel like a lunatic. I suddenly understood why my friends, who I'd thought where slightly backward, had been so addicted to these children's books. They're like crack.
I would love to tell you I've found the secret to eternal youth. I go to the gym and avoid too many chips. I love to eat, hate to work out, but if you can't count all your ribs from a distance you're considered obese.
This wasn't just a sitcom. It was like watching a five-act Ibsen play. Corbett was making us laugh, but we were laughing at his pain and the hopelessness of his situation. Then there were the story lines ... politics, class, religion, sex. This wasn't what an early-1960s comedy was supposed to deal with. Everybody knows his Steptoe voice, but that was nothing like his real voice. He was actually raised in Wythenshawe. He had that peculiar northern thing of trying to make his accent posher than it was. A bit like Harold, really. So much of his real life mirrored Steptoe and I think Galton and Simpson picked up on that. Unfortunately, typecasting was far more prevalent in those days. Harry H. Corbett was, without doubt, the finest actor in the country, but the more successful he was as Steptoe, the less work he was offered. He wanted to walk away, but he couldn't. He was very comfortably trapped. I've got mates who are in exactly the same situation. Starring in hugely successful shows, earning loads of money - but they can't stand their jobs. The country loved Harold Steptoe, but Corbett hated him. Really hated him.
I can't tell you too much about it because I'm not even meant to tell you that I'm in it. In fact, I might never work again now that I've been talking to you. I'm not in it for very long, let's put it that way.
I don’t mean to sound irreverent when I say I don’t care about the die-hard Trek fans. I only ‘don’t care’ about them in the sense that I know they’re all going to watch anyway. I look forward to having the fun of them being outraged, so they can sit up all night and talk about it with each other.
I got into shape because I took kick-boxing lessons every day to prepare for a fight scene with Taylor Lautner. I really wanted to lie down and eat Chinese food, but I kick-boxed every morning and ran. If someone was filming you with your kit off, you'd do the same thing.
It was a combination of a teacher from drama school who would constantly whisper in this very high voice, ‘You’ll amount to nothing, Isaacs. You will never work,’ and this British art critic, Brian Sewell. The director Chris Columbus, would come up to me and say, ‘So we had that take, it’s great, but could we do one more where you pull back on the voice like 80-90 percent?
Both a dementor and dementing. It would be cruelly hilarious if it was your uncle talking about a present they gave him in the care home, less so when the future of mankind depends on his ability to make decisions not based on his cock, his ratings or his bile.
#TrumpInWonderland
Actually Weinstein produced 326 movies, many of them iconic, but even had he cured cancer it wouldn't make sexual assault ok. My point was that his livelihood, reputation and freedom (possibly) are the price, whereas the pussy-grabber-in-chief wreaks his casual carnage untouched.
Charging my gadgets up for the flight home I relapsed and glimpsed. My feed seems to be all Trump and Weinstein. One's accused of multiple sexual assaults and is known to be a lying crook who cheated, stole and bullied his way through life. The other made 'Shakespeare in Love'.
That's how a real President writes on a day to remember the fallen. That's how anyone other than an narcissistic, racist, sexist sociopath would write. I was avoiding social media while on holiday with my family, but his toxic narcissism reached across the ocean and shook me.
RT Obama
You 'hereby demand' it on Twitter, do you, you pretentious, pig-ignorant parody of a prick? Then you'll make it official tomorrow? How exactly...parchment and quill? Skywriting? If you were investigated it's because there were and are grounds for it, but you know that don't you?
RT Trump
Because I twat about in make-up for a job, met these extraordinary folk today from the European Space Agency; they fly rockets, monitor probes, and collaborate with 22 countries to head off catastrophe and plan our best future. So it's doable then. Toldya.
There are very few problems in the world that couldn't be solved if we all just married Prince Harry.
Obama was desperate for reform of the gun laws, genuinely distraught by the loss of life and consistent in his dealings with the NRA. Know your history before you tweeze your dick around in the wind. And the slaughter of innocents isn't a game. Not to me.
God bless all? That's your best shot at a solution? You impotent, morally bankrupt, compassionless conman. You'll move on to praising the emergency services with a back-slapping exclamation mark before the bodies are cold.
RT Trump
Sometimes sharing one of #Trump's repulsive actions or statements feels like standing in a tsunami of sewage and pointlessly plucking out a single turd. But then I see genius like this and am reminded that every small gesture might bear fruit.
To the 40 kids going to my house for a party tonight: Lucius Malfoy's place, eh? What fun. Sorry I won't be there to meet you. I know where you all live too, btw. Touch any of my stuff and I'll kill you where you sleep.
Articulate and cogent argument from #Obama . Worth reading to be painfully reminded what a humble leader should sound like, why withdrawal from the Iran deal is catastrophic and to stock up on enough water, batteries and Sudoko to last though the fallout.
So there it is. #Trump just pulled out. If only his father had.
What kind of voters would trust #CaptainLorca? The kind that want to Make the Empire Great Again I guess. Would that they were only 3% in the world of porn-stars, putin-pleasuring and pee-pee-pals.
How curious that you follow me (and other left-of-centre celebs) and your feed is chock full of you doing precisely that: knocking Britain in every way. I don't dismiss your opinions because you're not a citizen, but because they're bigoted, ignorant and excremental
#TrollThis
Trump's America. If he stopped watching television all morning, stopped huddling with lawyers to work out what lies to tell next and stopped playing golf every weekend, his brief reign might be less of a shameful shitshow. Probably not.
#LiarsJenga #LastBricks
Always hope to go down well in the Nether regions.
#TheDeathofStalin
#ItllKnockYourClogsOff
So ironic and appropriate that on these petty, sordid details a petty, sordid dynasty might fall. Giuliani's clearly either a double agent or a total moron. Both, probably.
What a winning team.
#TheMightyFucks
Ouch. How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless Canadian.
#Logical
#KingLeer
#StarTrek
The pathological, terrifying thing is that he doesn't know he's lying anymore. It's first nature. He wouldn't know the truth if it indicted, impeached, convicted, imprisoned, shaved, shamed and shat on him.
But he will.
#ItTollsForTheeFuckwit
British politicians brought low by a lethal combination of volcanic hypocritical flatulence and hubristic testicular giantisis. Twats.
#PleaseNeverStopDoingThis
Hurry up! We all need a distraction from the terrestrial madness and an optimistic vision of the future, even if we'll all be wearing giant blue Spanx bodysuits with no pockets.
#StarTrekDiscovery
There's been a body without a brain in the White House for nearly 18 months now.
If you thought we'd seen crazy before, think again: #Trump's 30 minute unhinged call in to #FoxAndFriends proves that he's off his meds, off his tree and needs to be off the island.
#StreamOfUnconsciousness
I know there are and have been many worse people in the world, but I'm struggling to think of any right now.
#OrangeSupremacist
Let's listen to 99% of the scientific experts who confirm a climate change crisis, let's get every nation together to make a plan, then let's elect a neanderthal luddite to sabotage all environmental protection, domestic and international. Wait...looks odd written down
#EarthDay
Clearly people of exquisite taste. They must be the toast of St Mungo's.
God there's some bollocks passing for expertise on the internet:
It's a Yorkshire accent, because the character's blunt, uncouth and offensive and Yorkshiremen are, er, famously...articulate. And no-one has Russian accents coz we're speaking our 1st language. Da?
Let's not forget that lifelong racist @realDonaldTrump also called for the execution of the Central Park 5 AFTER they were proved innocent by DNA evidence. His father and the rest of his KKK cohorts would be so proud.
Glorious, hilarious metaphor for The Trump presidency, the Brexit campaign and my attempts to be a cool dad.
"Breeding"? Like animals? Like jews were breeding in the Warsaw ghetto? Like slaves? Like Irish Catholics were accused of, Mexicans, any group in history who've been victimised and dehumanised and villified? Your rhetoric (look it up) shames us all, as does your presidency #Trump
Fiery, passionate and chilling. Thank you to @JohnMannMP and those members of all parties who are prepared to fight #Antisemitism head on. Never thought I'd see the day, but then who thought we'd see the day that the #POTUS supported white supremacists and Russian gangsters?
So fantastically childish it's made my day. Dear dear darling @JeffBezos please send him twice as many tomorrow and I'll sign up for prime in every country I go to.
Just sat next to Bill, who told me that god created Adam 6000 years ago. When I asked if he believed the scientists who can date human bones older than that he told me that was pre-Adam man, an entirely different creature. Aha.
#BeamMeUpNOW
Now THIS is what you call a representative. A speech. It's Mark Anthony in Julius Caesar. Jack Nicholson in A Few Good Men. Trump in never a billion years of his wildest, wettest dreams.
Ew.
My bad. Just spent a rancid 2 minutes trudging through the alimentary canal of your feed. Anyone who retweets Anne Coulter, Nigel Farage, the Liar-in-chief, Katie Hopkins etc while spewing offense at the vulnerable and compassionate in every direction is just a hate-filled coward
Sunday's MustSeeTV: Trumplethinskin laid bare (eugh) as the lying, immoral, ignorant, sexist, self-obsessed bully we know him to be and the great @RealLennieJames relaunches #FearTheWalkingDead like an Apollo mission. Still miss #StarTrek's optimism though
Bit of a digital antidote to the negativity. Is it heartwarming or actually inspiring? Up to you. I'm asking myself what can I do this Sunday morning to be of service. Maybe it's money, maybe it's time, maybe it's expertise. What have you got?
Struggling to join the dots: a cornered trump, scared of a politically suicidal attempt to fire his prosecutors, discovers concern for Syrian victims (though won't let them immigrate) and threatens Russia with his latest wartoys. Nope. Don't see it. He's just a big hearted hero.
You lucky lucky man. Take good care of my beautiful DSC family, they're some of the nicest, most talented and woke folk this side of Alpha Centauri (though cook for them and they'll lie on their backs like dogs). Enjoy.
#LLAPInTheRatings
#MyChair
Painfully articulate refutation for those liberally inclined fellow travellers of mine who think the whole "anti-semitism-in-the-labour-party" thing isn't a thing. It's a thing. For my US friends, yep, you've still got it worse. Mondays eh?
#VoteFederation
5am. Woke for a pee and read this. Now I have to cleanse my mental palate before I go back to sleep lest legions of fake-tanned Trump youth doing the pussy-grab salute invade my dreams. Fucking fascists. Fucking jetlag. Fucking minibar chocolate is HOW MUCH?! Done.
#DarkDays
I thought it was just me being paranoid and that the bad old days of dodging British Nazis in the 70s were a fond memory. Are my parents right to instill a siege mentality? Am I wrong not to? What's happening to my fucking labour party?
#WeHaveGiantFishToFry
Gutted that I can't make it to Dortmund for what would've been my first fully Trekker convention. Luckily my infinitely more glamorous and innocent castmates @shazad and @may_wise will be there to witness the mayhem and report back. Please corrupt and deprave them for me.
#Sorry
#TBT Me and the scene-stealing elfin superhero formerly known as Dobby (pre-sockgate). Now current Attorney General of the USA, oddly. Thought I'd killed the little bastard.
#HarryPotter @HarryPotterFilm
Huge congratulations to my stupidly talented friends; the great @AnupamPKher, who steals every scene and social situation he's in and to the slightly less follicularly challenged @brianfobyrne, who's equally criminally gifted. Why not split it and keep it at my place?
#BAFTATV
50 years since the extinguishing of the civil rights movement's brightest beacon. He was an optimist but a pragmatist: "I have a dream" he said, but only after warning "It would be fatal for the nation to overlook the urgency of the moment." How will our children judge us? #MLK50
Wandered down a toxic cyber-path filled with the digital turds of Frank Stallone, Laura Ingraham and their fetid like...and stumbled on this shining flower. Happy Easter, Passover, Sunday or whatever brings out the best in you.
#Passover
#Easter
I had a dream last night in which I lost my reading glasses. Tragic on so many levels.
Just a few that spring to mind:
Both used the phrase "enemies of the people" to describe the free press.
Both demand public displays of breathtaking sycophancy.
Stalin had a moustache on his lip, Trump has one swirled around his head.
Your turn twittees...
#TheDeathOfStalin
Make no mistake, the psychopathic toddler who hijacked the White House is building a war cabinet to play soldiers with other people's lives while he shits on his gold toilet and uses both tiny hands to press the button. Bolton publicly advocated for a nuclear strike on Korea
#fkd
Clearly Trumped up charges. The American election was every bit as above board as Vlad the Colluder's.
#GoneBabyGone
If you believe FOX news, watch this. If you don't believe FOX news, watch this. If you run a country and believe that there's anybody left who isn't entirely sickened by every fibre of your existence...go hot-glue your hair-meringue.
#NotNewsToMe
I'm wondering which virtue you're signalling by defending him? Are you 'personally' in favour of pussy-grabbing, racial slurs, mocking the disabled, cheating employees, constitutional ignorance, pathological lying, nuclear sabre-rattling or just general fuckwittery? #VirtueThis
Holy misrepresentative quotes!!! That's the last thing I'd ever want. Serves me right for going all Eat, Pray,Love on her: I was talking about always trying to be being grateful for my life instead of thinking there was more to be had. Back to dick jokes.
Such bad timing. Trump's stress-tweeting as his haemorrhoids explode from the certain knowledge that he's going to be exposed for having his tiny little hands in the till and his puckered rose of a mouth buffing Putin's sack...just as the superb #DeathofStalin comes out. #WorthIt
If you win an #Oscar, we millions of viewers don't care who you give 10% to, who you couldn't have done it without or who does your colonics (unless there are pictures). Send them all a basket of artesanal carob and quinoa. Pull the curtain back and show us: who the fuck are you?
Inspiring and utterly beautiful. I just followed her and so should everyone. The kids are coming for you Donny-No-Mates, so are your ex-colleagues and so is the FBI. Send out for diapers.
#BeAfraidBeVeryAfraid
The golden walls are closing in on the urine-stained-swirly-straw-meringue and the utter human failure wearing it. Is it #MuellerTime or is it the imminent triumph at the @BAFTA awards of the film he and Vlad the Colluder tried to ban? @Death_of_Stalin @Aiannucci @davidschneider
Untrue. The majority of gun deaths are suicides and there's a consensus in the APA that a huge number wouldn't happen without access to the impromptu, irreversible technique a gun offers. Why all the badly-researched bullshit? Everyone gets that change is complicated. #InOrOut
Tell her there's nothing to be done. Tell her you hear her but it's just so complicated. Tell her her friends were slaughtered in front of her because in the 18th century they didn't want a standing army and that's why kids can fire assault rifles in schools. I dare you. #TellHer
Actually I trained as a lawyer and can recognise a heavily-lobbied political agenda disguised as quasi-legal interpretation as well as I can discern a patronising, reactionary troll from someone with an original idea. You're obviously quite happy with kids being slaughtered. #Sad
Save us from any more fucking thoughts and prayers. America is the only country in the world with this problem, Mr Trump, it's a shameful, avoidable monstrosity. You say you can fix things? Prove it. Do something.
#18SchoolShootingsByFebings
Note to self: undo jacket before putting your arm around anyone on camera or risk looking like hunchfront.
#MarvelTolkienPotterTrekMashup
Wherever you are on the political spectrum - including rabid Trump fans - you should watch this. It’s a whole lot bigger than any party politics and makes the President’s reluctance to acknowledge or address it almost incomprehensible. Almost. Unless...
#IfItLooksLikeADuck
Easy to be distracted by his indifference to domestic abuse, to the constitution, to his racism and greed being exposed or by the sabre-rattling lunacy of his rush to nuclear war, but here's the essential hollow heart of Trump. He couldn't give a fuck about the poor. #DoNotPassGo
#DiscoParty. No THAT’S the way to end. Holy fuck. SPOILER ALERT: Are you kidding me? The #Enterprise??!! #Pike??!!!! I can’t believe we have to wait till 2020 for the next episode. #LLAP everyone, and thanks for watching us - it’s been a privilege to serve. And lie. And kill.
#StarTrekDiscovery #DiscoParty That, ladies, gentlemen and blue people with horns, is how to (almost) end a first season and why @SonequaMG is our fearless leader. Not a dry eye or trouser in the house. But oh...what’s this?
#DiscoParty Sitting next to the amazing @marythechief here and marveling at how she conveyed pain, courage, love, loss and greatness while wearing a bowling ball of latex and a rhino suit. #LRellRules. No, literally, she does now.
#DiscoParty How the hell does @shazad make those #Klingon noises from his mouth without laxative?
#DiscoParty Honestly, do you care about blowing up Qu'nos? Federation shmederation, it'd save a lot of lives in the long run. Or is that the #MirrorLorca leaking out of me?
#EndsAndMeans
#StarTrekDiscovery #DiscoParty. So much for missing Lorca - I’m mesmerized. This is like 5 movies in one: a sci-fi thriller, a romance, a comedy, an action adventure and some very uncomfortable alien porn. Now we just need a big musical number. Oops...gave away the end.
#DiscoParty This is thoroughly inappropriate for a man of my age and delicate nature. #PutSomethingOnThatsNotAnAccessory
#DiscoParty #StarTrekDiscovery @SonequaMG is the queen of making the plot emotional and not a long list of seemingly disconnected gobbledygook. All bow. Honestly, who can tell me now what the plan is?
Live tweeting’s all very well, but this is a bit too tasty to look away from. I don’t want to miss any of #MichelleYeoh kicking ass with her tongue. So to speak. #DiscoParty #StatTrekDiscovery
My wife often says the same thing.
Me and the lovelies in Lycra will live tweet the West coast 5:30 feed of the #StarTrekDiscovery finale. It’ll be extremely spoilertastic, so, if you’re not watching or live in a shithole country (anywhere not The USA or Norway), stay off your dumbphones until you’ve seen it #LLAP
Exactly how I am in life.
When life is edited, lit well and has a jaunty wine bar score to it. Oh, and is slathered in make-up like a pantomime dame.
#StarTrekDiscovery
#DeathofStalin
#WhateverElseImIn
Gentleman's Journal https://youtu.be/zh5nerLJIds via @YouTube
#FBF The great #MichelleYeoh and a drunk man with newly transplanted limbs walk the first half of their epic fight. At half-speed, I swear.
#StarTrekDiscovery #JustAddLeather
Absolutely. Somebody win something, for fuck's sakes - that's just an embarrassing amount of nominations. Or don't bother coming home.
#DeathofStalin
@Death_of_Stalin
p.s. I'm in LA shooting a naked scene. If I win don't FaceTime.
Actually they're marching because we utterly believe in our health system that gives free care to all regardless of ability to pay - like most developed countries - and want it to work even better, you moronic, gold-toiletted, ratings-obsessed, pussy-grabbing, race-baiting child.
Mostly, I use twitter to check the important breaking news of the day. Mostly.
Hurrah. A break in the clouds. Stuck in LA listening to the radio and obsessing over redacted and leaked memos. Keep picturing Trump ploughing through piles of post-its.
#TBT The Spice Girls movie. I was cut for staring at @EmmaBunton's ample décolletage throughout the scene...EVEN THOUGH THE DIRECTOR TOLD ME TO! They were heaven. The girls, that is.
#DodgedACareerBullet
Out March 9th in America. See it before Trump bans it for his thin-skinned, sanctions-busting, election-skewing, nuclear-tea serving comrades. Apparently my perforrmance is treasonous and an insult to the memory of a great leader. Much like his.
#DeathOfStalin
#FunnyAsAllFuck
Irrationally, it’s not the fact that most of the GOP are attacking and undermining their own Justice dept and intelligence agencies to protect their cult leader from exposure, it’s the lack of any attempt to hide or disguise it that feels terrifying. Democracy seems undoable now.
That’s spectacularly honest for him. At this rate he might eventually tell the truth if he made a speech a day for the next 200 years. Although probably not. #BelieveMe
They're going to be even better without me. Now they can be Starfleet and I can just be a fan. The Discovery's in great hands -even if they’re Kelpian, huge and slightly rubbery.
#GoingBoldlyLeatherFree @actordougjones @SonequaMG
Make sure to watch tonight as the Liar-In-Chief's nose grows to elephantineine proprtions. Or should.
Sure. Let me post all the scripts online. Give me a minute to kill Santa first...
#TheOA2
First day on #TheOA Season 2 and I'm reminded of the power and transcendental beauty of storytelling.
Check out the kkk website, various white supremacist publications and anything from a V Putin.
#WhatWillHeTradeHisCigarettesFor
Yes yes. Me me. I've kicked the bucket, I've shuffled off my mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleedin' choir invisible. I. Am. An. Ex. Captain.
Captain's costume for sale. Size XS. Fits bloody nobody.
Just watched #13 of #StarTrekDiscovery and Holy McShitburgers, if it doesn't marry character, politics, treklore and kick-ass action in the most entertaining way then I'll give you all your money back. Just write to YouLyingSackOfShit@WhyDidIEverBelieveYou.com and ask for Donald.
On this #HolocaustMemorialDay, let's never forget our responsibilities today. What are we doing to provide safety to those fleeing violence and terror?
Could almost be a scene from the film, but without @Aiannucci to mine the humour, it’s just a thuggishly fearful response to the intoxicating oxygen of laughter. Allegedly. #DeathOfStalin #SeeItButTakeFakeID
Scandinavian ingenuity at its best, though I’m surprised there are any Norwegians left. Didn’t everyone jump on Trump’s invitation? #DeathOfStalin #LoveYouVladmir
You’re the editor of The Moscow Times, you follow me and you’ve called me a “jerk” in quotes. Just wondering if you’re quoting whoever tells you what to say or are you using it ironically, in fact meaning “Champion of free speech” and “Man in hysterical movie”? #DeathOfStalin
For all those asking if mirror Lorca makes it, if he or prime Lorca will be in season 2 or if this is the end of the mirror universe in #StarTrekDiscovery, why would you trust me? I’ve been lying to you from the beginning!
#BelieveMe #LiarInChief
Damn. Looks like our attempt to overthrow the politburo by judicious use of obscenities, slapstick and fart-gags been rumbled. I’ll have to send the cheque back to Hillary. #DeathOfStalin #SeeItBeforeTheCastDrinkGlowingSmoothies
Trust me, the space effluent is about to hit the rotational ventilator in the mirror universe. #StarTrekDiscovery
Day 1 @sundancefest #3. Captains Morgan and Lorca discuss a crossover: Zombies invade the USS Discovery and all the crew have to defend themselves are broomhandles. #TheWalkingTalkingTrek
Don’t know about Anthony (@albinokid), but I know I speak for @JonathanSFrakes and myself when I tell you we’re thinking “What’s for lunch?” and “How does my arse look at this angle. “
#StarTrekDiscovery #ActingSecrets
#FBF. Flashing back to Wednesday night in Hollywood: Lorca and Tyler celebrate their sitcom spinoff
#StarTrekDiscovery
#GentlemenPreferKlingons
Ah yes, luring poor unsuspecting #Trump into the old 'perjury trap'. Otherwise known as letting him open his lying mouth.
Who knew a tweet could make you puke, piss yourself and spray snot all at the same time?
#BrainlessBarbie
If you didn't watch @Oprah elevating the art of communication and inspiration at the @GoldenGlobes, get your children - get your daughters - and do yourselves a favour. Show them how leaders SHOULD speak.
Hoping for a Kanye moment at the #GoldenGlobes. Why thank lists of people nobody knows? Send them Yoga-Pants Scented candles and tell stories about who wouldn't screw you in school.
Meanwhile, #StarTrekDiscovery killed tonight. @jonathansfrakes could almost do this professionally
Damn Ravi, you mean when #StarTrekDiscovery returns tonight after its Christmas break only about 100 million people will continue to be glued to our soulless, bland acting hiding behind action packed CGI and we’re going to lose your 7 followers? All of them? That’s cold shit man.
Thrilled to fly to LA as the walls are closing in on the Dementor-in-Chief. Anyone who thinks eating McDonalds is a way to avoid poisoning doesn't fully grasp the security protocols involved in paper-wrapped food or indeed the concept of anal leakage #ItsNotFakeTanItsBigMacSauce
Jaw-dropping, sick-making, underwear-filling account of Trump's inadequacy and instability from inside the White House. Read it and see whose tiny fingers are on the very big button.
#HesReadyForHisCloseupMrMueller
Sorry to the family I saw earlier in the barber's and didn't want to take a selfie with:
1) I'd just seen Trump's tweet and was distracted.
2) I had really shit hair.
Stunningly managing to be both the biggest and smallest dick in the world.
We could all be ash soon because the dementing possessor of the world's most publicly ludicrous hairstyle is playground bullying the possessor of the world's second most ludicrous.
#BeamUsAllUpScotty
Happiest of New Years to anyone wasting their life on social media and taking the time to read the inane blandishments of attention-seeking solipsists. May 2018 find you with no signal often enough that you rediscover the erotic thrill of eye contact.
#ChineseYearOfTheMueller
Boxing Day in the UK. Back in the day Christmas Boxes, with gifts, tips and food were given to employees and the needy. Now we go to blow-out sales and realise how badly we overpaid for tat. Do something great: donate your unwanted gifts to charity. Then eat leftovers and moan. x
Yikes. Insensitive Cosby joke. Twat. But my pescatarian Christmas Dinner’s about to be served and I’ll be excommunicated if I don’t put the phone down and pretend not to be missing the turkey. Sorry.
Digital detox for 2 weeks. Slept like a Cosby victim. Missed nice work stuff: @britmarling said #TheOA starts in Jan, critics gave end-of-year love to #StarTrekDiscovery and #DeathofStalin won prizes and got into #sundance2018. Mostly missed you all, though. Yes, even you. Idiot.
Heart-breaking and inspiring to meet you and all the other families who have channelled tragedy into tireless fundraising for @GreatOrmondSt. There's nowhere like it - world class, groundbreaking treatment for sick kids, free and delivered with love. Give if you can this xmas.
Always good to have something to fall back on - particularly if you’re making indie films. Follow @BIFA_film and support the movies that have no lycra, no happy meals and no comics. #ExceptDeathOfStalinButThatWasAGraphicNovel
Look what you've done now. I snorted my tea all over my jeans AND pissed myself.
#ABotMadeMeLaugh #BuyYourselfASpellcheckDckhead
Didn't pander to the ultra-right and foist an unnecessary referendum on us, then allow demonstrably untrue propaganda to dominate the nationally suicidal debate though, did they? And handle the subsequent negotiations like a bunch of chimpanzees on acid? #LesserOfTwoEvils
Not wrong but understated I fear. At least there's no flamboyantly-coiffed seeming buffoon with an ultra-right following hovering in the wings with entirely malleable political opinions and a hunger for power. Phew, eh?
And the fact that he was banned from a shopping mall for trying to pick up young teenage girls? That numbers of them have braved being smeared as liars by your foot-and-mouthpiece to testify to the depth of his persistence and perversion? #GreatMinds #FillingTheSwampToOverflow
Trump supporters who work and pay taxes: you just got utterly, presidentially, non-consensually fucked. If you’re already extremely rich (or due to inherit), when your post-orgasmic shudder subsides, know that your fortress walls will never be thick enough
Very much not me tweeting this. Weird. What the extremely fuck? Is it Putin’s bots, Trump in his gold leaf and marble pajamas or someone in y-fronts so dirty they stand up by themselves? Why hack my account with Guardian crosswords?! I do the cryptic btw #SlightlyFreaked #Alot
Because you felt it appropriate and funny that Trump made a Pocahontas joke with the code-talking heroes who swung the balance of WW2. And did it under the shadow of the portrait of Andrew "Indian Killer" Jackson that he'd personally requested hang there. Shame on both of you.
He’s not aping, echoing or pandering to fascistic tendencies. He is, was and always has been a hate-filled danger.
Undoubtedly. Here’s what people miss with @WilliamShatner: the unbroken continuity and cross-pollination between the sublime, disruptive, iconic performances - as Kirk & Denny amongst others - and the provocative, take-no-prisoners tweeter. I’m all in. #ItsArtJimButNotAsWeKnowIt
Still not following, of course, but it’s good to know I could in an emergency.
To be unblocked by @WilliamShatner I had to marry off a ginger royal, fire an intercontinental missile at Japan and get Trump not to insult heroic Native American code-talkers in front of an offensive painting of their worst enemy (that he put there).
#TwoOutOfThreesNotBad
It's #GivingTuesday - an entirely apolitical, unquestionably wonderful tradition I'd urge you to uphold. If you can spare cash, pick a worthy cause and donate (you might consider @lumos). If you can't, think of someone who needs help and help them #TheRealThanksgiving
This is the universally respected ex-head of the NSA and CIA (and a world renowned cyber-security expert) responding to Trump's puerile lies and efforts to undermine the press. I have an overwhelming and unhealthy desire to hear duelling banjos and a breathy squeal #HowLowCanHeGo
Scanned your timeline and saw how often you retweeted the White Genocide hashtag, so you're clearly the kind of politically impartial intellectual colossus I need to take career advice from. Our fanbase can cope without you - don't let the burning cross hit you on the way out.
I've been blocked by @WilliamShatner. The unkindest cut of all. In what way have I broken the prime directive Captain? Was it the end of sentence minor-key uptick? The quizzical eyebrow (and blue eyeliner)? The just too-tight uniform? Forgive me my sins - it's an homage, I swear.
The #MuellerInvestigation just called and said you were PROBABLY going to be named Soap Monitor on your wing and would have to agree to an interview and a perp picture with your combover shaved off. I said that's waaaay fucking good enough for me. #TimeToStartPacking
Finally. A perfectly articulate, revealing, honest insight into the challenges facing the most powerful man in the world. And the single strongest argument for euthanasia I’ve ever read. #ThereAreNoWordsJustFluids
To my American friends, the best #Thanksgiving I can offer in these dark days is at least you’re not a turkey. To the Drumpfstick-in-Chief: enjoy the stuffing...this time next year that’ll be you. #ReadyForHisCloseUpMrMueller
On this thanksgiving day, I’m grateful that acclaim means so little to me that #DeathOfStalin absolutely crushing it in the @BIFA_film craft awards only makes me more humble. In the words of the great philosopher Charles Von Sheen...WINNING!!!!
So sorry Will. I just didn't want to have to write White Supremacist, Sex-Abuser, Anti-Semite, Liar, Sadist, Mysogynist, Thief, Science-Denier, Narcissist, Egomaniac, Draft-dodger and Ignorant Turd-Gargler and not have room to describe what a traitor he is to the office. My bad.
Make sure you avoid #Chaplin's #TheGreatDictator, selected by the Library of Congress for preservation in the United States National Film Registry and @MelBrooks' #TheProducers, of course. Both rubbish as well. #SatireShmatire.
Can any non-bot, double figure IQ, non-nazi Trump voters explain rationally to me (without pointless comparisons to Clinton/Obama) how you can still support a man who endorses child molesters, race-hatred and Russian interference in democracy? Isn’t it all non-partisan? #AllEars
They forgot reading Twitter in bed. Still, let’s try them, regroup tomorrow and see who’s president.
#DoWorryBeSad
Has there ever been a more infantile, witless, impotent, self-obsessed, intellectually-bankrupt pus-filled cockstump to perch, temporarily, on a seat of power? His only achievement is making his wife retch with the rest of us at the prospect of every new day. #AllIWantForXmasIs46
I like a debate, Edd, so how tragic you’re so pathetically wrong on every front. Even your spelling. Politicians invented sexual abuse and the swollen gland in the Whitehouse is a ratings-obsessed reality-tv star who boasts of being a sexual predator. Keep retweeting James Woods.
So that was #StarTrekDiscovery till Jan 7th 2018. Try and enjoy Christmas and New Year because the effluent really hits the aficionado when we’re back. Sweaty stuff. #LiveLongAndPerspire
To the justifiably trigger-happy on the look-out for gender-related bias, I called Trump a Mean Girl, as opposed to a mean girl. As in the Citizen Kane of High school movies. He’s also a *¥€]!
Will historians of the future understand, I wonder, that the escalating thermo-nuclear conflict that led to them scrabbling for survival on the smouldering remains of our planet came about because the American president was a mean girl? In a corset?
When I was a kid and burped deliberately at dinner, my mum made me stand on a chair and burp 100 times. These public masturbators should be given a reality show where they have to wank at each other 24/7 till their dicks drop off (or Harvey wins an Emmy). #TinyHandsMakeLightWork
#FBF Lucius’s attempts to stay incognito post Battle of Hogwarts were failing miserably. The pits were the giveaway. #LessMakeUpThanTrump
Concert-goers, toddlers at school, the faithful praying. Don’t insult them with thoughts and fucking prayers: DO something
#GunControlNow
Oh but they clearly do...YOU care. Enough to troll me in-between retweeting alt-right propaganda lies and Trump’s moronic bluster. Teehee.
If speaking out against racists, misogynists, bullies, homophobes, liars and warmongers ‘fogs’ my work...wipe the scum off your glasses.
Told my daughters that lying, cruelty, racism, greed, ignorance, violence and sexual assault can triumph. That their future means nothing.
Just wondering if you have some kind of mesh put in the seat of your pants so that people can hear you clearly?
Opine less. Read more. Shhh.
Actually, .@shazad bought ME one for my birthday. Then beat me like a junkyard dog in front of my family. Ash Whole.
The fierce, honest, brave @albinokid. My on-screen irritation and off-screen inspiration.
#AlwaysTheRightTimeToTell
Abonnieren
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